Down the Awesome Bunny Trail
by julien-schu
Summary: In which Gilbert attempts to flee from his overprotective younger brother, who is convinced that something awful would happen the moment he stepped outside alone with those fuzzy ears and tail. AU setting. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 1**

_The rabbit has a charming face:_

_Its private life is a disgrace._

_I really dare not name to you_

_The awful things that rabbits do._

_- Anonymous -_

Gilbert, Ludwig thought for the umpteenth time, was sometimes too cute for his own good.

Sure, when Ludwig was little, Gilbert would always come to his rescue when he was bullied by all the other kids. Even though Gilbert was smaller than Ludwig's tormentors, his brother always beat them up and sent them running home in tears, their tails between their legs.

(As a child, Ludwig was not sure why his big brother was the only bunny in a family that was generally made up of canines, but whenever he had posed the question to their father, the man would just get a faraway look in his eyes before succumbing to a nosebleed, and then shooed the boy off while mumbling something about passionate flings with a hot hare somewhere who dumped a screaming bundle of Gilbert in his hands a few months later.)

The problem was when the brothers were all grown up.

Everyone agreed that Ludwig took after their father and had grown up to be a _Schäferhund _who was not only well-built and strong, but also intelligent and fiercely protective. And Gilbert, whom their father insisted looked a lot like his mother, was still... cute. _Awesomely_ cute, like Gilbert often declared, and not to mention quick-tempered, but _cute. _

The problem with Gilbert's cute was that it was not the kind of cute that set off 'ooh, he's so adorable!' comments, accompanied by random pats on the head (although Gilbert still received this reaction from some of the old ladies down the street). Rather, Gilbert's cute was the 'ooh, he's so yummy can I just grab him and start ravishing him _right now!_' kind of cute.

Ludwig should know, because everytime he spotted Gilbert bending over to pick up something on the ground, he would feel blood rushing to some very _interesting_ parts of his body because the sight of that cute little fluffy tail in the air was just _daring_ him to rush over there and _squeeze– _

"Argh!" Ludwig would then yell as he smacked his head on the nearest hard surface, just to get some very dangerously dirty thoughts out of his mind.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Gilbert would ask in confusion.

"Nothing!" he would reply as he hid his blushing face behind his sleeve, trying to stem the trickle of blood trailing down his nose.

It wasn't that his brother was totally helpless. No, Gilbert was still quite capable of kicking butt, as he had demonstrated a couple of times against his friends Antonio and Francis whenever they came to visit. Particularly Francis. Ludwig still made it a point to stick around whenever he came over, just in case he decided to do more than risk a grope or two at Gilbert, but most of the time Ludwig's presence was unnecessary since Gilbert never seemed to have any problems throwing his so-called friends out the house.

Ludwig also made it a point never to let Gilbert go out alone, just in case someone decided to take more than a fancy to Gilbert. It annoyed Gilbert to no end; his older brother would grumble and complain about he was more than old enough to go out on his own and he certainly did _not_ need a bodyguard, and especially when that bodyguard was his own baby brother.

"I can beat the shit out of anyone who comes at me, no problem!" he would declare, but Ludwig would just ignore the statement and still tag along some distance behind.

Come to think of it, it was far easier for Gilbert to just bend over and virtually everyone in a 15-metre radius would just faint from the massive blood loss caused by excessive bleeding from the nose, Ludwig privately opined.

Especially when Gilbert was wearing shorts. _Yarrrrgggg._

Actually, Ludwig concluded, the _real_ problem was that Gilbert had absolutely no idea just how irresistible he was.

Gilbert always assumed that the people staring at him wanted to pick a fight with him, whereas they were thinking of a different kind of fighting entirely (in bed, or heck, on the pavement then and there). This usually led to a brawl, and then he would have to break it up. Thank goodness that Gilbert usually went limp the moment Ludwig grabbed him by those ridiculously cute and fuzzy bunny ears to drag him home, but Ludwig had to make sure that Gilbert was _not_ facing him when he did this. That first and only time Ludwig did otherwise gave him some really hot and uncomfortable dreams for days, and an understanding as to why their father could never talk about Gilbert's mother without getting a nosebleed. Why? Because not only did Gilbert go limp when he was yanked by the ears, his cheeks also turned a very fascinating shade of pink; his eyes were half-closed, while his lips were parted a little, practically _begging_ to be kissed. Ludwig had to headbutt the nearest tree to think straight.

Today probably required some more ear-yanking, since Gilbert wanted to go to town and get a new video game. (Ludwig of course, would have to come along, but he needed to do some grocery shopping anyway.) If it were anyone else, Ludwig would have complained on how video games were just a waste of one's money, but he kept silent when it came to Gilbert; a new game would ensure that Gilbert would stay safely indoors for at least two weeks.

But was Gilbert ready to go? Ludwig checked the clock on the wall. If they did not make a move soon, there would be a long queue at the shops, especially if it were that strange Greek cat's turn to man the counter. He knocked on the door to his brother's room and asked, "Are you awake?" When he did not get a reply, he opened the door.

"Oh, hey West," a partly-dressed Gilbert greeted as he buttoned his shirt. Thank goodness Gilbert had his boxers on.

"Sorry. Uh, breakfast's ready."

"Yeah, be there in a minute."

Ludwig left the room not only to give Gilbert privacy to finish dressing, but also to avoid seeing that (not sexy, dammit, but don't look anyway, he told himself) hip-wiggle his older brother did in order to get his (cute) tail in that little slot in the rear of his trousers.

Oh well. At least Gilbert decided not to wear shorts.

-x-

Ludwig scanned the perimeter for potential predators, sexual or otherwise. Let's see; cats, dogs, a sheep or two, and that strange panda who kept trying to sell some rather odd merchandise in that little stall of his. Nothing that his brother could not handle. Satisfied that the area was secure and safe for Gilbert, he finally deigned to loosen the iron grip he had on his brother's arm, who had been unsuccessfully trying to wriggle free, swearing loudly all the while.

"Dammit West! I told you to let go twenty minutes ago! If that new game is sold out because you're being a freaky mother hen, I swear I'm going to–"

Ludwig never actually heard what Gilbert had threatened him with, since his brother quickly disappeared into the gaming store down the street (the owner was a fox, but after screening and inquiries Ludwig determined he was relatively harmless) and the last thing Ludwig saw before he went inside was that his fuzzy white ears were sticking up in the air, twitching in obvious irritation. The younger brother sighed and hoped that Gilbert would not get into too much trouble while he did the week's marketing, and that his older brother remembered to wait at that small place that served pancakes with maple syrup down the corner which was owned by... by?

He frowned, and then shrugged. Oh well, it did not matter.

Armed with his own shopping bag (he was doing his bit to save the environment), Ludwig headed for the shops. He calculated that he had roughly forty minutes or so to do his grocery shopping before something Gilbert-related was bound to happen. If he were lucky, he would have enough time for a quick visit to the bookstore and maybe get a new book or two; he had a sudden urge to make some _Rumtrüffel _and would need a recipe book.

He absently wondered if the bookstore would have a guidebook that would be relevant to his current predicament. Something like, _How to Deal With Somewhat Clueless Older Brothers With Gargantuan Egos, _perhaps?

-x-

Gilbert's foul mood improved somewhat when he discovered that while the video game he wanted to buy _(S__uper Awesome Bird Legion of Doom__ Part VIII)_ were indeed sold out, the store owner had thoughtfully reserved a copy for "his loyal customer". He was so ecstatic upon obtaining the game he unthinkingly hugged the proprietor, a fox called Kiku, who promptly stuttered and stammered on how improper it was for customers to do so, but the fox later got a funny look on his face and asked if it were all right for him to take a few pictures of Gilbert's tail. A strange request, but since it seemed pretty harmless and might even secure him a guaranteed copy of _Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom Part IX_, Gilbert thought nothing of it.

A few snaps later, Gilbert left the store and made his way to the pancake place. The polar bear who owned the establishment made some really awesome pancakes, lovingly served with delicious maple syrup, although he was fond of mumbling on how people never noticed him and had a strange habit of talking to a rather disturbing-looking white teddy bear. Gilbert placed his order and then took a seat at one of the tables outside. His younger brother insisted that he remain in plain sight at all times, "just in case something happened".

Gilbert snorted. He could handle anything that came at him, but after more than a few boring and not to mention lengthy lectures from his sibling he had decided it was just far easier to abide by his brother's wishes.

"Where is West anyway?" he wondered aloud and looked around. Oh yes, there he was, his little brother, who never looked happier in a neat and orderly queue for fruits and vegetables at one of the stalls (oh for fuck's sake, his tail was actually _wagging)_.

"Ve~ Gilbert, why are you talking to yourself?"

He turned around to find his brother's close – or should that be only? – friend, Feliciano, an _Italienisches Windspiel_ who lived nearby. "Oh, hey there Feli," he greeted, ignoring the little dog's question.

Feliciano took a seat at the table. "Are you eating pasta?" he asked brightly.

"No, they serve only pancakes here. What are you doing here anyway?"

Feliciano looked disappointed. "Oh, Lovino threw me out of the house because he said I was too noisy. So I was just wandering around and then I got hungry so I thought I might as well go to town and see if I can get some decent pasta!"

"At least your brother actually lets you go out all by yourself," Gilbert muttered.

"Ve?" Feliciano blinked in confusion.

Gilbert rolled his eyes. "West won't let me out of his sight! I can't even take three steps out of the house without him following me around like – like some goddamned _nursemaid!_ What the fuck is his problem anyhow?" he ranted.

"Ve, I think it's nice how he's worried about you! Lovi doesn't worry about me, he just yells at me a lot. I'd offer to make some pasta for him so he would feel better, but then he gets angrier and starts shouting even louder."

Gilbert went on, only half-aware of Feliciano's comments. "I'm older than him! The awesome me can take care of myself! I don't need a fucking bodyguard!"

Feliciano shook his head in sympathy. "Really? Can't you just sneak out or something?"

He snorted. "Are you kidding? He locks me up in the house if _he_ wants to go out! That's not fair!"

Feliciano nodded and waved his arms enthusiastically. "You're right, ve! It isn't fair how Ludwig can go out by himself, but you can't! If doggies can walk around in freedom, then so should bunnies! Just like other doggies and kitties and birdies and turtles and sheep–"

"Okay, Feli, I get the idea..."

"–and cows and pandas and sloths and lemurs and think of _all the pasta you're missing!"_ Felicano said, gasping out the last few words in a high-pitched shriek before he slumped in his chair, panting.

"Here's your order, sir!" The polar bear proprietor of the establishment walked to their table, carrying a tray of pancakes and a glass of iced tea, distracting Gilbert. He was just reaching for his napkin when he heard his brother yell.

-x-

Done with his shopping, Ludwig headed for the pancake establishment. He froze for a full second, and then ran at top speed when he spotted a white bear headed in Gilbert's direction.

"Get away from my brother!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, startling the fur (or feathers, since there were a couple of birds around) out of everyone in the vicinity.

"Whaa – _West?" _Gilbert said in confusion, before Ludwig successfully tackled down the bear that was about to get its evil clutches on him, sending pancakes and maple syrup flying all over the place, while Feliciano let out a very startled 'Ve!' and hid under the table.

Wait, pancakes and maple syrup?

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Gilbert thundered as he gave Ludwig a very painful kick in the ribs. Gilbert may be smaller, shorter and lighter, but – _ow!_ – his elder brother, like all bunnies, had considerable leg strength. And Gilbert was not afraid to use it.

"Ow! I was trying to save you from–"

"From my lunch? Are you seriously out of your mind?"

"But this bear–"

"For the last time, West," Gilbert snarled, _"he owns the fucking shop!"_

The poor bear underneath Ludwig moaned. "No one remembers me," he muttered.

"Oh." Ludwig promptly turned pink with embarrassment. He got to his feet, narrowly dodging another painful kick from Gilbert, and helped the bear up. "I – I'm terribly sorry! Look, I'll pay for all the damage..." Ludwig hastily shoved some money into the polar bear's apron pocket.

"Argh! My pancakes!" Gilbert groaned, tugging at his hair in frustration.

"I'm sorry!" Ludwig apologised again, this time to his brother.

"Not as sorry as you'll be when I'm done kicking your ass!" Gilbert snapped.

There was a murmur from the crowd, which sounded suspiciously... appreciative and admiring? Ludwig blinked, then panicked. Oh no, he had forgotten something important.

An angry Gilbert was also a very, very _adorable_ Gilbert.

A few in the crowd started looking rather hungrily at his brother, who was all flushed with rage and his cute fluffy tail was twitching slightly.

"No time for this now!" Ludwig blurted, and with a quick, practiced gesture, spun his brother around and yanked Gilbert's ears. Gilbert automatically went limp with a startled yelp and Ludwig threw his brother on his shoulder, retrieved his shopping bag on the ground and quickly ran for home.

-x-

"I'll make pancakes for you tomorrow morning, all right?" Ludwig said in apology as the _Schäferhund_ herded Gilbert into his room and into bed, ignoring Gilbert's grumbling and muttering. Ludwig had yanked really hard on his ears this time, making him feel rather woozy, which was why his younger brother insisted on an earlier bedtime tonight instead of playing his new video game.

"Good night," Ludwig said once he was satisfied that Gilbert was comfortably tucked in bed, then switched off the lights and left.

Fine, Gilbert decided rather sulkily, since West insisted on treating him like a child even though he was the older one out of the two, he might as well have some fun.

"West!" he yelled.

His brother opened the door to his room mere seconds after he shouted. "What is it?" Ludwig asked in concern and worry.

"I'm thirsty!" Gilbert complained. "Don't we have any milk?"

Ludwig rolled his eyes and sighed before disappearing into the kitchen, then returned with a glass of milk. "Here," his brother said as he handed the glass, "now go to sleep!"

"Weeeeeeeeeest!" Gilbert yelled again just as Ludwig closed the door.

The door opened and Ludwig poked his head inside. "What now?" he asked in obvious irritation.

Gilbert put on his best pleading expression, all wide eyes and floppy ears. "What about my bedtime story?"

_"Bedtime–" _ Ludwig halted, then made a low growl and clenched his fists. "Once upon a time there was a very annoyed _Schäferhund_ who was starting to get a migraine and would refuse to make pancakes for breakfast in the morning if a certain _immature_ rabbit of a brother did not go to sleep! _The end!"_ he half-shouted before slamming the door shut.

Gilbert stuck out his tongue before he settled under the covers, grumbling. So he was immature? Fine.

He didn't want to be mature. _Fruits_ matured.

He would rather be _awesome_.

And the road to ultimate awesomeness was out there, he just knew it.

* * *

**Additional notes:**

i. _Schäferhund_ - German shepherd. I can't bring myself to use the English term because every time I see 'German shepherd' I keep picturing Ludwig carrying a stick while surrounded by white fluffy things that go _meeeeeeeh._

ii. _Italienisches Windspiel_ - Italian greyhound. Apparently they're good at running.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 2**

"Gilbert? It's late, you should get up already!" Ludwig shouted from the kitchen. Strangely enough, there was no answer from Gilbert. Normally Gilbert would yell, or more often than not, swear at Ludwig in reply.

Ludwig sighed. Was Gilbert still asleep, or was he simply sulking?

Gilbert had been more than a little bit angry about the incident at the pancake parlour in town yesterday and he was_ definitely_ furious about being shoved into bed much earlier than usual last night. Ludwig flinched a little in guilt; he had yanked on his brother's ears a whole lot harder than usual, forgetting how sensitive they were in his hurry to get home yesterday. Gilbert had not only gone limp then, he was also rather pale and listless when they reached home, which had sent Ludwig into a fit of panic until his older brother had stomped on his foot, grumbling that he was fine.

"Breakfast's done!" Ludwig tried again. A few minutes passed and still no sign of, or even a word from Gilbert.

_Definitely_ sulking. Oh well, only one way to remedy that.

Ludwig took a deep breath, made sure that there was nothing breakable nearby and braced himself before he yelled, "There's pancakes!"

He only caught a swift glimpse of something white and fuzzy from the corner of his eye before he found himself being hugged enthusiastically from behind by his older sibling, who was grinning like a maniac. Whoever said that rabbits were not as swift as dogs should try beating Gilbert in a footrace with pancakes or video games as the prize.

"West~" Gilbert singsonged, "you're my favourite brother in the whole world!"

"I'm your only brother in the whole world," Ludwig pointed out, a hint of a smile on his lips. Well, Gilbert's only _known_ brother, at any rate. He was pretty sure that there was no way that Gilbert was his mother's only child, if the stories their father told Ludwig about her had some truth in them.

"Whatever," Gilbert shrugged, but he still kept his hold around Ludwig's middle. "My pancakes?" he asked, floppy ears almost flapping in delight.

"I'll get them for you, if you let go," Ludwig said, barely resisting the urge to pet Gilbert on the head. He had made an extra effort today to make the pancakes fluffy just the way his brother liked them as a gesture of apology for yesterday's mess. And judging from the way Gilbert wolfed them down, they were done perfectly to his tastes. "By the way, don't mess up the living room today," Ludwig said as he put his plate in the sink.

"Hmm?" Gilbert looked up from his meal, while Ludwig automatically reached behind him to wipe the corner of his brother's mouth with a napkin. Gilbert was such a messy eater sometimes.

"Feliciano's coming over for dinner again tonight."

"Oh. So does that mean–"

"Yes, he's going to bring pasta for us."

"Again?" Gilbert wrinkled his nose. "You know West, the kid's really cute and all, but seriously the whole deal about pasta for breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack-time does get tiresome after a while–"

"He said he'd bring some of that gelato you like so much too," Ludwig broke in.

"–which is why he should come over more often since his gelato is awesome!" Gilbert finished, holding up his fork in a triumphant pose.

Ludwig rolled his eyes.

-x-

"Ve~ Ludwig!" Feliciano greeted enthusiastically before he latched himself onto his host. "It's so nice to see you!"

"Hello there, Feliciano. Come on in," Ludwig replied and took the bag and containers Feliciano had dropped on the ground when he had flung his arms around the _Schäferhund_. Hopefully their dinner was still intact.

"No hugs for me?" Gilbert called out from where he sat on the couch.

Feliciano obediently unlatched from Ludwig and launched himself at Gilbert, who returned the hug and patted his head. "Did you bring me ice cream?"

Feliciano nodded, smiling. "Yeah! I brought you gelato and pasta – _aaah!_ Where did they go?" He looked around in panic, while tears started to well up in his eyes. "Oh no! I know I was holding them a while ago because Lovi was yelling at me for forgetting them when I first left the house and I was sure I left with them the second time and I must have dropped them somewhere and _oh no the pasta–"_

"I got them right here," Ludwig answered, holding up Feliciano's bag and food containers. "Give me a few minutes and I'll get everything ready, all right?"

"Wow! How did you find them? And so quickly too! Ve, you're really wonderful, Ludwig!" Feliciano gushed, while Ludwig's cheeks turned pink.

"It's nothing, really. I-I'll just get this settled," Ludwig stammered a little before he went into the kitchen.

"Ve, Gilbert!" Feliciano whispered.

"Huh? What's with the whispering?" Gilbert asked. "It's kind of hard to hear you with the TV on."

"Lovi says you have to whisper when you're doing conspiratio... constipa... no wait, I'm pretty sure that's something different – ve, _you know,_ secret-secret things! He does that whenever he meets those weird friends of his, the ones who wear hats and sunglasses all the time. Even when they're indoors. Ve, why do they have to wear sunglasses indoors? There's not much sunlight–"

"Uh, Feli? What secret-secret things?" Gilbert interrupted before Feliciano could ramble even further.

"Oh! Ve, I have an idea!"

"What?"

"I'm going to help you leave the house!" Feliciano announced. Rather loudly.

"What was that?" Ludwig hollered from the kitchen.

Gilbert winced. "He said that he needs some help with a mouse!" he yelled back while clamping a hand over Feliciano's mouth; Gilbert knew he would repeat exactly what he said, with disastrous consequences.

"Oh, I could go and take care of it tomorrow!"

Feliciano looked confused when Gilbert removed his hand. "But I haven't got any problems with mice–"

"Shh!" Gilbert hissed. "Secret-secret things, remember? You have to whisper."

"Ve, you're right!" Feliciano said softly.

"So what are you planning?"

"Oh, you should pack some things in a bag first. You know, just to get ready!"

Gilbert nodded. That was certainly a good suggestion; something he had never quite expected from the rather flighty Feliciano. "Okay, and then what?"

Feliciano put on the most serious expression on his face and Gilbert simply could not help but sit up straighter to pay attention. "Don't forget the pasta!" the little dog announced.

Gilbert slumped and resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Yes, yes, the pasta. _Then?"_

Feliciano drooped a little. "I haven't quite figured out that part yet, ve~" he muttered, casting his eyes downward. "I'm sorry!" he started blubbering, waving his arms.

"No, no, it's okay! Now stop that, or West'll thump me in the head for making you cry!"

Ludwig chose that moment to poke his head in the doorway. "What's going on?" he asked, his eyes narrowing.

"Everything's fine, West! See? Little Feli here is fine and happy!" Gilbert hastily replied, pinching Feliciano's cheeks and stretching them out in a smile.

"Ve~" Feliciano managed to blurt out as he waved, then gave a thumbs-up. Ludwig gave them another suspicious look before he returned to the kitchen, shaking his head.

"Actually, there is something about the whole West checking out your house for mice thing," Gilbert said once they were in the clear. A plan was starting to form in his head and if he could get Feliciano to help him, it might just work.

"Huh?"

"Just do as I say, all right? Tomorrow, I'll tag along when West goes to your house to check on your _fictional_ mouse infestation."

"Ve, and what should I do?" Feliciano asked excitedly, his tail wagging.

"You just be yourself, okay?" Gilbert said, scratching Feliciano behind the ears. "Just leave everything else to the awesome me." He grinned.

Oh yeah, he was on his way to the road of awesomeness, all right.

-x-

"Must you wear shorts?" Ludwig sighed and put a hand to his forehead.

Gilbert frowned. "Why not? It's hot."

Ludwig sincerely hoped that his brother was referring to the current outdoor temperature instead of the other more _suggestive_ definition, because Gilbert certainly looked like the latter with a good deal of his pale, muscular legs on display. Ludwig also fervently prayed that there was no reason for Gilbert to bend over. "You could stay home instead of coming along."

"And what the hell am I going to do then?" Gilbert grumbled.

"Play your new video game?"

"It's too hot to stay indoors! Especially since we're the only ones on our street without any air-conditioning!" Gilbert complained.

"I told you, air-conditioners aren't exactly beneficial for the environment – oh never mind, just stay home!" Ludwig snapped. It was indeed a hot day and he was not in the mood to deal with Gilbert's theatrics.

_"What?"_ Gilbert's bunny ears shot up in the air as he stared at Ludwig in genuine, wide-eyed shock. Then those ears just flopped down and Gilbert's lower lip started to quiver dangerously, while the tiniest bit of tears started to well up in his eyes–

"Okay, okay! Let's go!" Ludwig hastily changed his mind before his brother started yet another one of his infamous sulks, which would begin with a bit of sniffling and then conclude with a fair deal of kicking, with Ludwig on the receiving and not to mention rather painful end.

Despite all of Gilbert's posturing and boasting on how cool he was all by himself, Ludwig knew that his brother _hated_ being left alone for long periods. Their father had explained it to Ludwig once; apparently that particular trait was present among most rabbits and hares, which was how their parent actually managed to – _ahem _– engage in relations with Gilbert's mother. Gilbert was raised mostly as a canine, so there were times (just now, for instance) when Ludwig needed to remind himself that his older brother still possessed more than a few characteristics of his floppy-eared brethren.

Gilbert immediately cheered up and with a snicker, hopped to follow Ludwig out of the house. Ludwig quickly grabbed his hand and ignored his attempts to pull free. He was _not_ letting Gilbert loose, not with that pair of shorts his brother had on.

"Shit, so I'm supposed to let you hold my hand like I'm some kindergartener now? What next? You're going to put me on a leash?"

"Actually, that is a rather sound idea–"

"Don't you fucking _dare,_ West! Bunnies don't wear leashes! Only doggies!" Gilbert snapped. He paused for a moment before he added thoughtfully, "Actually West, you _would _look kind of hot with a leather collar."

Ludwig promptly blushed. "Shut up!" he grumbled, while Gilbert merely cackled, amused. So amused, Ludwig noticed, that he seemed to have forgotten about his complaint on having to hold hands, for he allowed himself to be tugged along.

"Why do you insist on coming along anyway? I could drop you off at Antonio's," Ludwig offered. Ludwig certainly trusted Antonio a little bit more than Francis; the turtle was a little slow on the uptake but he had a good heart. Gilbert used to say jokingly that Antonio was 'faster than a speeding glacier, more deadly than an enraged hummingbird'. Oh, and there was the fact that Gilbert could beat him up in case he did try anything funny. Tackling Feliciano's rodent infestation might take the whole day, and Ludwig knew that his brother would get bored and then start complaining. Feliciano's brother Lovino also did not like company very much; while he had gotten used to Lovino calling him all sorts of names, he sure could do without the impending migraine caused by Lovino and Gilbert throwing insults at each other.

"Feliciano's got air-conditioning," Gilbert replied with a smirk, "and he's probably got some more of that tasty ice cream too!"

Ludwig rolled his eyes. He should have expected something like that from his brother. Still, he could not help ask, pointing at the small bag Gilbert slung over one shoulder, "What's with that backpack then?" It was not like Gilbert to bring anything like that whenever they went out.

Gilbert turned slightly pink. "What, this? It's just some stuff."

Ludwig looked at his brother suspiciously. "What stuff?"

Gilbert shrugged. "My handheld. Some comic books. A bottle of sunblock since _someone_ would bitch if I didn't go out without having some on for fear of getting skin cancer. _Stuff."_ He glared at Ludwig. "You want to go through my things now?"

"No, I was just asking," Ludwig said, raising his free hand in a gesture of apology. He relaxed, thankful that at least his brother had thought of things to occupy himself when they were at Feliciano's. At first he suspected that his brother was up to no good, but apparently Gilbert simply wanted to enjoy a cooler environment and some cold treats, nothing more.

-x-

Gilbert mentally sighed in relief, glad that his brother had not suspected a thing. That stunt of offering Ludwig to check his backpack could have backfired; if his brother did end up going through his bag, Ludwig would have discovered that apart from the things he had mentioned (minus the bottle of sunblock, since sunblock was for wussies), he had also stowed some clothes and a few keepsakes – a sure sign that he was going to bolt the moment Ludwig let down his guard.

Gilbert was still annoyed that Ludwig refused to let go of his hand though, but he decided to pretend that it did not bother him much. Need to lull his overprotective brother into complacency. Oh yeah.

The journey to Feliciano's was uneventful, except for that one occasion where one of the old ladies down the street made a remark to Ludwig on how nice it was for him to take 'his adorable little brother out on a trip.' Gilbert had found this horribly amusing, while a blushing Ludwig merely sputtered and tried to explain that _he_ was the younger brother, not Gilbert, but the silly old bat (and that was meant to be taken literally) would have none of it.

The two brothers soon arrived at Feliciano's and Ludwig still did not let go of Gilbert's hand even when their excitable host literally flung himself out the door to cling to Ludwig in an enthusiastic hug.

"Ve, Ludwig~ You came!" Feliciano gushed, beaming. "Oh, hi Gilbert!"

"Hello Feliciano," Ludwig greeted, while Gilbert waved with his free hand. "Is your brother home?"

"No, he went to see those strange friends of his with the hats and sunglasses."

Eager to get started and as efficient as ever, Ludwig asked, "So where should I start?"

"Start what?" Feliciano blinked in confusion.

"You know, the mouse thing," Gilbert said hastily, hoping that Feliciano remembered their conversation yesterday. In the name of the _Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom_ series, _please_ let him remember.

"Oh! Yes, the mouse! Umm, I've seen it in the kitchen and the storeroom!"

It took a great deal of effort from Gilbert to stop himself from twitching his bunny ears. Storeroom? Perfect.

"I'll start in the kitchen then," Ludwig said, dragging Gilbert inside, following after Feliciano. Only after they entered the house (ah, blessed air-conditioning at last, Gilbert thought) did he finally let go of his brother's hand. "Can you find something to do while I work?" he asked Gilbert.

"I have gelato!" Feliciano offered and promptly went to the refrigerator to retrieve the dessert.

"You read my mind, kid." Gilbert grinned and took a seat at the kitchen table.

Ludwig rolled his eyes, and then his sleeves up. "You could help, you know," he said as he started checking the back of the cabinets for signs of mice.

"Of course I can, but why should I?" Gilbert retorted before he took his first spoonful of his ice cream. A little show of irritation was probably in order, since Ludwig would be even _more_ suspicious if he were _too_ well-behaved. Besides, he was still annoyed over the whole having to hold hands business.

"Never mind." Ludwig sighed and went back to work. After a while of poking his nose behind cabinets, looking for mice trails or droppings, he shook his head and stood up. "There's some scratches and wear at the back of the cabinets, but I'm not really sure if they're caused by mice. I'll check the storeroom."

Yes, yes, check the storeroom!

Gilbert's bunny ears and tail _did_ twitch in excitement this time. He had been quite disappointed when he found that the kitchen was tidy, but both Feliciano and Lovino liked to cook so it was somewhat expected that the area was kept in order. But the storeroom? He resisted the urge to cackle. "Why don't you show him where's the storeroom, Feli?" Gilbert suggested.

"Okay!" Feliciano nodded and tugged Ludwig by the arm out of the kitchen.

A few moments later, the house shook when Ludwig yelled, "Just look at this mess! No wonder you've got a problem with mice!"

Gilbert silently said a prayer of thanks to the patron saint of hardcore neat freaks and slowly got up. He poked his head out of the kitchen to find that Feliciano, as absent-minded as ever, had left the front door wide open. He crept in the opposite direction and saw that Ludwig was busy scolding a very dejected Feliciano on the horribly messy state of the storeroom. Not that he blamed Ludwig; even _he _was impressed at the chaos. How _did_ Feliciano ever manage to get, of all things, a Vespa on that shelf?

He grinned.

Sure enough, Ludwig's desire for impeccable order and Feliciano's inability to keep things reasonably organised was a perfect combination for his plan. Gilbert knew that all he needed to do to keep Ludwig distracted was to give his neat-obsessed younger brother something to tidy. Now that Ludwig was in what Gilbert called his Stern Cleaning Mode (note the determined look, the stiffly-erect doggie ears and the furiously wagging tail), nothing short of a meteor strike would shift his attention.

Gilbert was about to make his exit when he realised that he had forgotten something important. He walked to the kitchen table, grabbed the bowl of ice cream and grinned.

Then he promptly bolted out the front door.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 3**

Gilbert ran as fast as his legs could carry him, knowing that even with the massive distraction Feliciano had unthinkingly provided, it was only a matter of time before his overprotective brother would realise that he was missing, and he needed to put as much distance between him and Ludwig as fast as possible. Sure, he was fleet-footed, but he was still a rabbit (but a cute and awesome one!) and despite his mostly-canine upbringing, he still could not compete with Ludwig's speed at long distances, lacking the staying power of dogs.

Ludwig also had a better sense of smell than he did, but at least his little brother was not the air-scenting type. Still, Gilbert took whatever steps he could think of to try and lose his scent – or at the very least, do enough to confuse Ludwig. He ran back to their neighbourhood (finishing his ice cream all the way), leaping over several fences in the process and hoped that Ludwig would lose his scent in the midst of all the other different smells.

After one rather spectacular jump over a chain-link fence, he took a moment to catch his breath. A cat – the actual animal, not the people kind – purred as it rubbed itself against his legs, perhaps hoping for some food. Inspiration hit him and he picked up the little feline. He dug into his backpack and took out one of his shirts he managed to rescue from the hamper before Ludwig did the laundry this morning, and tore its sleeve off with his teeth and free hand. Then he swiftly tied the piece of cloth to the animal's tail then let it go, watching it flee into safety before he took off in the opposite direction. Originally he had simply thought of just tossing the shirt somewhere to lead Ludwig into a false trail, but this idea was even better. Hopefully if Ludwig managed to get this far, the cat would lead him away, or at the very least, confuse him.

He continued running, not really caring where he went, as long as it was far away. Did he usually go left here? Why not go right then? And why bother going down the main road when there's this interesting-looking little alley? The surroundings grew more and more unfamiliar until at last he reached the far outskirts. He then eyed the large amount of inviting greenery in front of him.

And why the hell not?

He grinned, adjusted his backpack into a more comfortable position and then ran into the woods.

-x-

"There, that should do it!"

"Ve, everything is so clean and tidy now! Ludwig, you're wonderful!"

"Oh... well, it's nothing, really. I arranged everything in alphabetical order too, so it would be easier for you to find things!"

"Ve..."

"Feliciano?"

"Did you arrange all the stuff according to their German names, or Italian?"

"… I'll just start over."

-x-

Gilbert was making rather good progress in his journey to freedom from nursemaid little brothers; he had double-backed a few times and even jumped over a small stream, hoping that would be enough to prevent Ludwig from tracking him down. He had even changed his clothes, mentally congratulating himself on his awesomeness for packing some gear more suited to the now cooler weather. His spirited efforts had tired him a little, so he decided that he had earned a short respite. He had ceased running half an hour ago, slowing his pace to a sedate walk as he made his way down a small trail that had seen very little use of late.

The trail he followed led off to a rather interesting-looking burrow that looked abandoned. His tail twitched in excitement; another rabbit trait still strong in him was his fascination with burrows and similar holes. He used to get into all sorts of trouble when he was younger for disappearing for hours into old tunnels and warrens, earning him a good scolding from his father when he returned home for dirtying his clothes and for making both his father and brother worry.

The burrow looked big enough for him to enter, so he shoved his backpack in front of him and then pushed himself inside. It was a tight fit, but he managed to wriggle himself through and then landed ungraciously on his behind to find himself sitting down in a rather largish chamber. He eyed the underground room and decided that it would probably do as shelter for the night, but perhaps it would be a good idea to explore a little more of the warren. Tail twitching in excitement, he picked one of the tunnels and started walking.

Then he let out an ear-splitting scream when the floor gave way.

-x-

"At last! Now I'm finished!"

"Ve, that's wonderful!"

"Now that's settled, let's see about those mice. Gilbert, do you mind helping me out – _Gilbert?"_

"Ve?"

"Gilbert? _Gilbert!_ Where the hell did he go?"

"Ve..."

-x-

Gilbert winced and hobbled down a small path. The floor of the tunnel he was checking out had given way under his weight and sent him sliding down another long tunnel, then out flying of a hole in the side of a hill. He had landed rather awkwardly on his right foot, and ended up twisting his ankle rather badly.

Wonderful. Especially when it was already dark and he still had not found shelter for the night.

Suddenly Gilbert froze and sniffed the air. There it was; faint, but the musky odour he detected was one that he associated with predators. Not that he was afraid or anything, but with his right leg injured and the fact that the surroundings were unfamiliar dictated that he should find someplace to hide – err, observe the situation – before he could deliver the appropriate smackdown if necessary. He looked around and spotted another burrow; though his most recent experience with one was not exactly favourable, he had no other alternatives.

His night vision was a little wonky compared to his floppy-eared peers, since he had never liked eating carrots; the meals in his household mostly consisted of meat and potatoes, plus the occasional cake or ice cream for dessert. (Ludwig had tried making him eat supplements, worried that the family diet, designed mainly for carnivores, would effect his health since technically he was _supposed_ to be a herbivore. Gilbert complied for a while, but stopped taking the supplements after the cute animal-shaped ones were withdrawn from the market.)

Due to his somewhat reduced nocturnal capabilities, he misjudged the width of the hole he decided to dive into. His backpack went in just fine, so did his head and his shoulders, but his downward momentum came into a halt when it came to his waist. He tried to wriggle himself in, and then out when that direction did not seem to work, but all to no avail.

He was stuck in a most humiliating position, his rear end sticking up in the air, his legs scrabbling in futile at the ground, while the rest of him was wedged in the too-small burrow. Panicking, since that musky scent was getting stronger, meaning that whatever animal it was from was getting closer, he tried to wriggle free again but still he failed.

Clinging to the frail hope that the approaching animal had lousier night vision than he did, he kept still, hoping that his dark clothes would camouflage him somewhat. Then he came to a panicked realisation; his trousers and boots were certainly dark enough, but his tail was the far opposite – it was stark white.

The musky scent got stronger and stronger and Gilbert could hear rustling as something moved nearby. "How interesting," said a dangerously close voice, "now, what is that white fluffy thing, yes?"

Gilbert gulped.

"Hello? Is someone there?"

Gilbert silently debated whether he should answer, or remain still. Before he could decide, he felt someone poking his thigh. "Hey!" he blurted out in reflex; while his voice was somewhat muffled due to the fact that his upper half was stuck in the burrow, it was still loud enough for that someone to cease poking.

"Oh, excuse me!" There was a long pause before the unknown individual asked, "Are you playing a game?"

There was no way anyone this _stupid_ would be a dangerous predator, Gilbert concluded. "Yeah, it's called 'I Like Sticking My Tail Up In The Air'," he growled, rather wittily too, he thought.

"Oh." Another long pause. "Is it something like hide and seek?"

"Oh for fuck's sake – hey, _stop that!"_

The poking had resumed and despite Gilbert's shout of protest, it did not stop. Instead, the individual started poking higher and higher, causing Gilbert to let out a startled yelp. "What a cute little tail! It looks so nice and soft!"

"Hey, keep your hands off my _– aack!"_ Gilbert yelled, but it was too late. He felt a hand gently grasp his tail before giving it a little squeeze and – and what the hell, what the _fuck, why_ did he just let out that _completely_ not awesome moan? He gasped and covered his mouth with his hand as he tried to kick or even wriggle away from the touch, but it was no use; with every single gentle stroke or squeeze of his tail, he could feel his cheeks growing warmer, his legs weaker and the front of his trousers getting _tighter._

His tormentor seemed to be enjoying it, for he heard the person say in an amused voice, "This is fun! And I think you seem to like it too, yes?"

Gilbert tried to yell that no, he did not like it at all, and he was going to kill the moronic stranger but what came out of his mouth when he removed his hand was a loud gasp, then an even louder moan. He was shivering; not with cold, he was_ definitely_ not cold at all, but instead he felt like his whole body was far too warm, and being stuck in the warren did not help things either. He was not quite sure what happened next; he barely registered the sound of his moans and gasps as they echoed in the small tunnel and then all he knew was that he felt a sudden rush of relief, before his whole body went limp in strange exhaustion.

"Excuse me... are you all right in there?"

The stranger sounded worried, but Gilbert was too tired to answer, or even to worry about how he needed to change his underwear.

"Maybe I should not have played with that tail too much, yes?"

Gilbert's eyes widened when he felt hands around his waist. Then he gasped when those hands gave a very, very sharp yank; a blur and a whoosh, and then he was out of the warren to land on the ground in a messy tangle of limbs with his molester-cum-rescuer.

He blinked, then realised that he was lying on top of a... a... _oh shit those ears it's a fucking bear!_

"Let go!" he yelled out in panic, for the bear was still holding his waist, and he raised his hand so that he could elbow the bear's face. Rather, he _tried_ to, for he could only manage an odd, floppy motion that was as threatening as an enraged parakeet flapping a broken wing.

"Are you all right?" the bear repeated as he slowly got on his feet, carefully tugging Gilbert up along with him. Before Gilbert could reply, the bear beamed and added, "You have really cute ears!"

And before Gilbert could even say a word, the bear yanked on them. Hard.

-x-

"Ve... Ludwig, please slow down a little."

"Feliciano, I can't do that! I need to find Gilbert! There's no telling what could happen to him!"

"I'm sure that he's okay!"

"Well, _I'm _sure that he's _not!"_

"But Ludwig, why don't you just let him be? Ve, I think bunnies should be able to run around in freedom!"

"Feliciano?"

"Yes?"

"My brother put you up to this, didn't he?"

"Ve... that's a _very_ scary look on your face, Ludwig."

-x-

Gilbert was half-dozing, totally immobile in his captor's arms. Earlier the bear had yanked_ really_ hard on his bunny ears, even harder than Ludwig ever did, which had caused him to drop listlessly on the ground. He could sort of register that the bear had panicked the moment he crashed with a dull thud, then felt himself being carried before the bear started walking.

He shivered; he did not know where the bear was taking him, but it was certainly somewhere cooler than what he was used to. The bear must have noticed, for he heard his captor making cooing noises that were probably meant to reassure him. He would have frowned at being treated as some completely unawesome invalid, but instead he found himself burying his face in the bear's coat.

Screw it all, at least the bear was warm, he thought. That warmth slowly seeped throughout his body, lulling him into a deep sleep.

-x-

"This... this is from his shirt!"

"Ve?"

_"You!_ What happened to him?"

"Meow?"

"Ve... I'm pretty sure that poor cat did not do anything to your brother, Ludwig."

"…I knew that!"

-x-

What was it about mornings that made him want to stay longer in bed, where it was warm and cozy under the covers?

Oh yeah, the cold. Brilliant.

Gilbert yawned and rubbed one eye sleepily as he stuck his head out of the layers of bedclothes. He squinted at the bedside table, looking for his awesome chick-shaped alarm clock, but in vain. "West?" he yelled in annoyance, "did you take my clock? I don't care if the alarm's broken, it's not like I ever use the stupid alarm anyway!"

There was no reply from his brother, which puzzled him. Usually a yell from him would either bring Ludwig running, or at the very least, an even louder yelled response. He tried again. "West?" When there was still no reply, he threw off the covers and sat up.

Wait a minute. No chick-shaped alarm clock, no chick-print bedclothes, no TV and video game consoles in the corner – this was not his room. Heck, this was not even his house! Where the hell was he?

He looked around. The windowless room was huge, and so was the bed he was in. The walls were painted a dull blue, while pictures of sunflowers hung here and there. Strangely enough, there were also several pipes and water faucets on a table – were they actually polished? – as if they were on display.

Gilbert shook his head violently, hoping that it would clear his head. What the hell happened to him? A few more shakes, and his bunny ears shot up in the air when he finally recalled the details of last night.

'Oh shit' was putting it mildly.

Great. He managed to flee from one horribly overprotective _Schäferhund_ of a younger brother, and now got himself trapped in the house of a weird bear who was... a plumber?

His journey to awesomeness had taken one hell of a detour, and he did not like it one bit.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 4**

Gilbert turned to look when he heard the door open. A tall figure walked in, carrying a tray of food. He was wearing a long coat, a scarf and gloves – but there was no mistaking it, not with that scent and especially those ears. It was that bear from last night, and Gilbert automatically crouched slightly, just enough for him to launch himself into an awesome kick with his left foot aimed at the bear's head, knocking the predator out cold.

Well, that was the intended plan anyway. Since he was still only partly awake, he had forgotten to factor in one important thing: his right ankle was in less than awesome condition.

There was a rather ghastly crack and then the room fell silent.

"Are you all right?" the bear asked in concern when Gilbert's awkward half-hop only sent him toppling onto the floor, howling in pain as he clutched his injured foot.

"I'm fine!" Gilbert hissed and tried to stand up.

The bear put the tray he carried on the bedside table and then with a smile, slid his hands under Gilbert's armpits and easily lifted him up off the floor and sat him down gently on the bed, as if he were nothing but a small child. Gilbert swung one fist at the bear's jaw, but the bear easily caught his wrist with one hand, and made the same move with the other.

"Hello," the bear said, still smiling, as if capturing injured bunnies were a normal daily occurance – and it probably was for him, the weird plumber freak. Gilbert made a mental note to beat the _Leberwurst_ out of every plumber he came across once he got himself out of this.

"Fuck you," he snarled, trying to wrench his wrists free but it was no use; the bear held them in an iron grip.

The bear cheerfully ignored the insult. "My name is Ivan. What's yours?"

"It's Gilbert you freak, now where the hell am I? And where the fuck are my clothes?" This last bit was snarled out when he realised that he was dressed in pyjamas that were just a little too big for him.

"Gilbert! You are in my home, yes? I found you playing that strange game last night. Your clothes are in the wash, since I did not think you would have wanted to sleep in dirty things."

His cheeks bright red in embarrassment and rage, Gilbert renewed his struggles to get his hands free, causing the bear to frown.

"Please don't do that. You'll hurt yourself," chided Ivan. "I think your leg is bad enough, yes?"

Gilbert, who had been doing a very good job of ignoring the throbbing pain in his right ankle so far, winced ever so slightly.

The tiny change in his expression did not get past Ivan unnoticed. The bear frowned and stared at the injured foot. "That's funny... I don't think it looked that bad when I brought you in last night. Maybe you should lie down."

"I'm not going to – _owww!"_ Gilbert instantly went limp when Ivan yanked on his ears, and would have toppled over if the bear had not caught him in time. "Mrrrrgggh," Gilbert grunted into the bear's coat.

"Excuse me?"

"Ears," Gilbert managed to mumble.

"Ah. They are cute and fuzzy, yes?"

It took a few attempts, but somehow he managed to work his vocal chords again. "Sensitive."

"Oh. But I noticed that it keeps you quiet." Ivan seemed to hesitate before he asked, "Did that... hurt?"

"Mrggggh."

Ivan interpreted that grunt as an affirmative, which sent the bear into a panic. He carefully laid the listless Gilbert in bed and drew the covers over him, all the time stammering on how he was going to get his elder sister to take a look at Gilbert and that Gilbert should stay here and try not to move, before he left the room.

Gilbert would have grumbled that he was not exactly in the condition to go anywhere, but decided it was not worth the effort. He was somewhat thankful that even though the ear-yanking had rendered him immobile, it also dulled the pain in his ankle somewhat. He managed a sleepy yawn before his eyes closed.

-x-

He slowly woke up when he felt something rather damp and cold being wound around his injured ankle. Not opening his eyes just yet, he heard Ivan's voice and a female voice; the elder sister the bear had mentioned, most likely. He stirred slightly, but a gentle hand stroked his head, then his floppy ears. The caress promptly made his consciousness hold a little debate over the merits of waking up.

"See? Like that. Don't pull them anymore, Vanya."

"But he goes quiet when I pull them."

"I don't think it's good for him, especially considering how strong you are. You might hurt him, and that's precisely what you want to avoid, right?"

"Oh, all right. Like this?" The hand was replaced by another; bigger, and a little hesitant, but equally gentle.

"Yes, just like that. See? He's all nice and quiet. I think he likes this better."

Staying asleep, one; waking up, zero.

-x-

When Gilbert woke for the third time that day, it was to a rather odd sensation around his injured ankle. He slowly sat up and threw off the covers to find that his right foot was snugly wrapped in a white plaster cast. "Great," he muttered to himself. At least the stupid throbbing had ebbed away somewhat; even though it had not completely disappeared, it was bearable.

The tray of food was still on the bedside table, covered with a napkin. There was also a note on table that read:

_I will be back after work. Please try to eat something._

_- Ivan -_

Work? Gilbert frowned. Oh, must be out doing plumbing stuff.

Gilbert uncovered the tray and discovered that it held a large bowl of stew, a plate of bread and a glass of milk. He stirred the stew with his spoon; it seemed to consist of cabbage, some meat, onions and sauerkraut. Sniffing experimentally, he decided that it was probably safe to eat and took a small spoonful. It was not anything like West's cooking, but it was all right. He started eating and then was quite surprised that he actually finished all the food; he must have been hungrier than he thought.

He eyed the cast on his foot. How was he supposed to get around with that thing on? Oh well, he was awesome, he would manage somehow! A few hops on his uninjured foot and he managed to make his way to the table with the faucets and pipes. One of the pipes was long enough for him to use as a cane, which made it easier for him to move.

Unfortunately for him, the door was locked. It also looked more than rather sturdy, so Gilbert did not want to risk injuring his other foot trying to kick it open. The other door in the room led to a small bathroom, and the window was too small for Gilbert to climb out. Grumbling, he went back to bed and proceeded with what he usually did when he was left alone with nothing to do.

He sulked.

-x-

Ivan came home that evening to find Gilbert sitting on the bed with his legs drawn up to his chest, his chin resting on his knees, glaring at the wall.

"Gilbert?" Ivan said, but was only treated to a rude gesture in response. At least his guest finished the food he left on the bedside table, he noted. "Still hungry? Do you want anything to eat?"

Gilbert shook his head.

"Okay! Bedtime then!" Ivan declared before he climbed into bed. Then he came to the conclusion that if his guest were uninjured, Gilbert would have jumped and crashed smack into the ceiling. But due to the plaster-clad foot, Gilbert could only manage a little arm-flailing before he fell face first into the mattress.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Gilbert snapped as he sat up.

"Going to bed?" Ivan answered, beaming, despite the fact that Gilbert's hand was pushing rather hard on his face.

"Get another bed then!" Gilbert demanded.

"But this is the only bed in the house! And it is more than big enough for the two of us, yes?" Ivan pointed out; in fact, the bed could easily accommodate at least five people. "I won't hurt you, I promise. I did not know that pulling your ears was not a good thing to do, yes? Not until my sister told me."

Gilbert made an odd grunt before he removed his hand from Ivan's face. His eyes were still narrow with mistrust, but he scooted over to the far side of the bed, dragging a pillow with him.

Understanding the gesture, Ivan smiled and made himself comfortable on _his_ side, then drew the covers over himself. "Good night," he said before he reached for the switch just above the bedside table and turned off the lights.

He received merely another grunt in reply, but Ivan figured that was good enough.

-x-

When Gilbert woke the next morning, he was alone.

The other side of the bed was neatly made, with some clothes lying on top of the pillows, while his side remained a messy tangle of bedclothes. Yawning, he was about to yell for his younger brother to make him breakfast when he remembered that he was no longer at home, but was in the lair of a bear.

Hey, that rhymed!

Oh wait, it was not exactly something to be excited about, and he just managed to stop himself from cackling in glee.

He rubbed his eyes sleepily as he sat up, then looked around. Just like yesterday, a tray of food was left for him on the bedside table, covered with a napkin; even the note was identical. He frowned; was Ivan into recycling like his little brother, or was the bear just cheap? He decided it was the latter.

When he lifted a corner of the napkin, he found that even the meal was exactly the same as yesterday's. (So Ivan was cheap _and_ boring.) Thankfully, the pipe he had used for a cane was leaning against the table. He used it to help himself hobble along to the bathroom where much to his surprise and delight, a set of toiletries was left on the counter for him. (Okay, maybe Ivan was not cheap, Gilbert reluctantly amended, but he was still boring.)

After some awkward manoeuvring aided by his makeshift cane and a great deal of swearing, he emerged from the bathroom, feeling slightly better now that he was all cleaned up. He changed into the clothes left for him; pyjamas that were just his size, but still not comfortable enough due to a small detail. There was an unpleasant sound of tearing cloth before Gilbert finally decided that yes, his clothes were finally a perfect fit now that he could slip his tail out of the makeshift slot he just made.

After he finished the meal left for him, he tried the door again and to his excitement, it was unlocked. Perhaps this was his chance to escape? He hobbled as fast as he could out of the bedroom, then down a rather long hallway before he reached what seemed to be the living room. An ornate door seemed to be his way out, but he was frustrated when it was locked. The windows were either too small, or jammed shut.

Not awesome. Not awesome _at all._

Gilbert let out a sigh of disappointment and plopped himself down on a couch. Sure, he was awesome all by his lonesome – provided he had stuff to amuse himself with. At least when Ludwig locked him indoors, he had his video games, laptop and comic books. But here? There was not even a radio or a TV in sight. How was he supposed to keep himself occupied?

Lower lip sticking out ever so slightly, Gilbert decided that he might as well spend his time plotting on how to kill Ivan when the bear got home.

-x-

Ivan certainly did not expect anything to happen when he unlocked the front door and stepped inside his house. All he saw was a white blur and had he played any video games, he would have recognised the loud shout as being identical to that of the bird ninja commando's attack cry in the _Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom_ games.

"What–" That was all Ivan managed to get out before there was a loud metallic clang as something hit him right in the abdomen, then somewhat bounced off. The next thing he knew was that a bunny in front of him rolling on the floor, swearing loudly. He blinked.

"Ow! Dammit! What the hell was that?" Gilbert snarled, tears of pain in his eyes as he clutched his left foot.

Smiling, Ivan unbuttoned his coat. "Pipes?" he said, showing Gilbert the few steel pipes he had in his specially-designed inner pockets.

"Why the hell are you carrying those fucking things in your _coat?"_

Such odd questions! "They are too long to fit in my toolbox, yes?"

"Screw this," Gilbert muttered.

Ivan blinked again. "Slotted or Phillips?" he asked helpfully.

This linguistic confusion was promptly brought to an end by Gilbert hurling the first thing his hand came across – a throw cushion, which never seemed more aptly named – at Ivan's head. The bear ducked, then put his toolbox down so he could pick Gilbert off the floor and set his adorable, hissing guest on the couch.

"I'm sorry," Ivan said, smiling, "I had no idea you wanted to greet me when I came home!"

"Mrggghh."

"Oh look, now you've hurt your other foot! Stay right here, I will go get my sister."

-x-

"Hey wait, don't–" he began.

Ivan had not heard him, for the bear left and closed the front door.

"–leave me here alone," Gilbert lamely finished.

Wonderful. More mindless waiting and doing nothing for him. At least when Ivan was here he could practice his (already awesome, but it did not hurt to make an effort to ensure it stayed that way) throwing aim.

He was still sulking when some time later the door opened, this time to admit Ivan and a young woman with blonde hair dressed in a simple shirt and overalls inside.

-x-

To Ivan's relief, Gilbert did not throw anything at him or his sister when he opened the door this time. His guest sat silently on the couch, glaring at him with undisguised annoyance and suspicion, but Gilbert's expression changed when the bunny turned to look at his sister. Gilbert's eyes widened with surprise, and his cheeks turned slightly pink.

"What did you do this time, little brother?"

"I didn't do anything," Ivan protested as he went to get a footstool for Gilbert, so that it would be easier for his sister to tend over his guest's latest injury.

Gilbert remained quiet as Ivan's sister knelt down and fussed over his foot, something Ivan was thankful for since his sister was rather timid and would have likely found Gilbert's usual boisterous behaviour frightening.

"Well, you will have an ugly bruise on your foot, but other than that, it is nothing a good night's rest won't cure. Not like your right foot, though. That one has to stay in a cast for a while, since you have a fracture."

Gilbert nodded. Ivan noticed that his guest's cheeks grew redder as his sister moved closer. Strange. Was Gilbert shy? Perhaps that was why his guest could not seem to look at his sister's face, Ivan decided.

She smiled, pleased with her docile and obedient patient. "I'll make an ice pack for you, all right?"

When she left the living room, Gilbert motioned for Ivan to move closer. Curious, Ivan complied. "What is the matter?" he asked.

"Your sister... I thought she'd be a bear like you, but she doesn't have the ears..."

Ivan nodded, comprehending. "Oh, that. I'm the only bear! My older sister and my younger sister are Wisent!"

"Wisent?"

"It is a kind of... bison, yes, I think that is what some people call it."

"A bison? You mean like a wild cow?"

There was a loud sniff, and both of them turned to find a certain female Wisent starting to break into tears. "Did he just call me... a cow?" she stammered, then dropped the ice packs she carried when she covered her face with her hands. She began weeping.

"No – no, I didn't call you a cow," Gilbert hastily assured her, "really, I didn't!"

"Sister, he's right!"

The weeping Wisent paused in mid-sob. "But I heard–"

"No, you've got it all wrong!"

A small sniff. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure! How can I lie to someone with such a big bos– err, heart?" Gilbert said, his eyes wide and his ears flopping down in an absolutely adorable expression. Ivan barely resisted the urge to run over there and squeeze Gilbert silly, but his sister made no such effort.

"How cute!" she gushed, rushing over to the couch and hugged him close to her chest, petting his ears. "I forgive you!" she announced when she finally let him loose.

"You can forgive me any time..." Gilbert mumbled in a rather dreamy tone. Was that a small trickle of blood trailing from his nose? Ivan was about to move closer to make sure, but Gilbert wiped his nose with the side of his fist.

"What silly things you say! Here, now keep that ice pack on. Ivan, I'm going home now, so take good care of the cute little bunny!"

"Okay! Thank you, sister!"

"Hey Ivan," Gilbert said a few moments after she left, "do you think your sister can come visit more often?"

-x-

Gilbert seemed to be in a much better mood after meeting his sister, Ivan decided. The bunny did not complain when he had to be carried to the bedroom, although he did swear at Ivan a little when he was tucked in on his side of the bed.

Ivan went to change into his own pyjamas before he started to climb into bed. Gilbert had wriggled free out of the covers, and was staring suspiciously at him. "I'm staying on this side, so don't worry!" Ivan said.

Gilbert muttered something and threw Ivan one last glare before he turned on his side. Ivan blinked when he was presented with a view of Gilbert's back... and tail.

Fluffy, white, oh-so-inviting, come-and-have-a-squeeze tail.

* * *

**Additional note:**

Wisent – European bison


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 5**

For as long as Gilbert could remember, even though he was a (cute and totally awesome) bunny his father treated him just like a puppy when he was growing up, albeit with one exception; he was sternly told not to let anyone under any circumstances, ever, to touch his tail. That one particular statement was repeated throughout his childhood and his teens – _especially_ his teens – and was in fact, the last thing his father told him before the man left on some ridiculous expedition years ago.

"Why not?" he had asked his father curiously when he was about ten. "Everyone else gets their tails yanked a lot when we're playing. Especially Roderich." Probably because everyone else's tails were a bit longer than his, but more likely because he was better at dodging.

"Your tail is different from theirs."

"Different? You mean like more awesome and a whole lot cuter?"

The tall _Schäferhund_ had simply sighed and put a hand to his forehead, a gesture that Gilbert's younger sibling would frequently make when the brothers were grown up. "Something like that. Just don't let anyone get anywhere near your tail, all right?"

"How about West?"

"No, not even your little brother."

"Oh. Not even you?"

"Dear god,_ no,_ because that would give _me_ one hell of a psychological trauma no amount of therapy can fix. Grabbing your mother's tail was how you ended up being dumped in my hands years ago," the _Schäferhund_ had said, then hastily added when he noticed his eldest son had started to wibble, "but you're such an adorable little thing!"

Gilbert had not thought much of the whole hands-off-my-cute-but-awesome-tail business until he was about fourteen, when curiosity finally got the better of him and he had decided to poke and prod his own tail. He certainly did not feel any different even after ten minutes' worth of prodding and squeezing, but that did not spare him from the severe scolding and ear-twisting his father gave him when he was caught in the act.

Still, making sure no one ever touched his tail was something so ingrained in him – and the fact that he was, after all, just that awesome – was how he managed to evade any tail-gropers throughout his life. Therefore, that night when he had gotten himself stuck in that burrow was the first time _anyone_ had ever grabbed his tail, with some very surprising consequences. He had wondered why _that _never happened when he touched his own tail, but perhaps it was like trying to tickle yourself; it just did not work and that you needed someone else to do it to you.

And he was sure that he did not want _that_ to happen to him for a second time.

So when Gilbert felt a rush of air and a sudden warmth near his back, his bunny ears shot up straight and he very nearly jumped out of bed when he turned to find Ivan's smiling face just inches away from his own. "What – h-h-hey! You said you were staying on your side!" Gilbert stammered in shock.

Ivan's smile merely grew bigger, while Gilbert's eyes widened when he felt Ivan's hand on his tail.

_Oh shit, not again!_

Gilbert inadvertently let out a strange-sounding yelp at Ivan's touch and tried to scoot away, but for some reason his legs refused to move. He opened his mouth to yell at Ivan to quit it, but the bear tightened his grip and Gilbert ended up gasping instead. Much to his own surprise, he found himself arching into the bear's touches.

"You like that, yes?" Ivan muttered.

"No, I – huh?"

His half-hearted protests were ignored and Ivan pulled him closer; the bear now had Gilbert practically in his arms. Gilbert tried to push himself away, but his hands merely grasped at Ivan's clothes in desperation as Ivan gave his tail a slow squeeze, while he let out an absolutely not awesome whimper.

"Does it hurt?"

Gilbert knew he opened his mouth, but he was not sure what exactly he said in reply. Whatever it was, it seemed to please Ivan, for the bear smiled and stroked Gilbert's hair with his other hand. The gentle caress, coupled with the teasing touches at his tail, was just too much for him; what little coherence he had left decided to stuff it and go somewhere else for a while, and he found himself closing his eyes.

-x-

Ivan was surprised, but pleased when Gilbert ceased struggling and relaxed in his arms. Like he mentioned to Gilbert, Ivan did not want to hurt him. At first Ivan was afraid that Gilbert would be mad at him for squeezing the rabbit's tail, but it looked so soft and inviting he could not help it – and besides, Gilbert did not seem to be angry. He just made some really odd noises, but Ivan was pretty sure they were not angry ones. In fact, he seemed to be enjoying the experience.

"Gilbert?"

Gilbert mumbled something unintelligible in response. A little worried, Ivan pushed himself into a sitting position, carefully moving Gilbert's rather listless body in his arms so that Gilbert was now straddling him, chin resting on his shoulder. Was Gilbert asleep? No, surely Gilbert was awake, since although he had his eyes closed, he was moaning softly. Or perhaps he was sick?

That worried thought caused Ivan to accidentally give Gilbert's tail an even harder squeeze. Ivan's eyes widened when Gilbert let out a loud gasp and gripped his arms. "I'm sor–"

"More."

"–ry?"

_"More,"_ Gilbert repeated, his tone almost commanding.

Ivan was confused, but he complied and grasped the soft furry tail in his hands a bit more firmly, before he began loosening and tightening his grip in a slow and steady rhythm. By now Gilbert was starting to pant, his chin digging rather sharply in Ivan's shoulder, while his hands were almost clawing at Ivan's clothes in time to the bear's ministrations to his tail.

More interestingly, Gilbert was also starting to smell... rather... _nice. _

Ivan found himself burying his nose in Gilbert's soft hair, breathing in that wonderful scent; strange, yet oddly sweet. Ivan stroked Gilbert's hair, then his ears, remembering how the gesture seemed to calm him last night. However, instead of calming down, Gilbert's breathing grew more erratic and that intriguing scent he was giving off grew stronger as he pressed himself closer, hips grinding against Ivan.

One hand still on Gilbert's tail, Ivan used his other hand to grasp Gilbert by the chin and the bear leaned back a little to look at him. His usually pale cheeks were tinted a shade of rosy pink; his lips were parted slightly, while his eyes were closed. Fascinated, Ivan rubbed his thumb gently against Gilbert's lower lip, then lightly ran his knuckles down Gilbert's cheek before he reached down to slide his hand underneath Gilbert's clothes. He needed to take care of that particular hardness he felt rubbing against his thigh now, didn't he?

Gilbert made no protest when Ivan began stroking him, but instead made sounds that only encouraged Ivan even further. Matching the strokes with the rhythm he had established with his ministrations on Gilbert's tail, it did not take long before Gilbert came in Ivan's hand with a loud sigh, then slumped against the bear. Ivan thought he looked adorably exhausted with his head resting against Ivan's chest, cheeks still flushed a bright red, while those fuzzy ears hung limp.

"You're so pretty like snow in winter," Ivan said, beaming as he hugged Gilbert close, "but you're so nice and warm."

Gilbert probably did not hear him, but Ivan thought that was all right.

-x-

Ludwig was usually a neat and composed person. Normally his hair would be slicked back with not even a loose strand hanging off his forehead, his face cleanly-shaved, ears and tail brushed until they practically shone, while his clothes would be perfectly cleaned and ironed.

Today however, Ludwig's hair was not only unkempt, he was also sporting a slight stubble, while his ears and tail looked a little ragged. His clothes were wrinkled, having slept in them the previous night. There were dark circles under his eyes, making him look older than his age.

"Ve, you look awful, Ludwig," Feliciano said as he observed his friend pace back and forth in the living room, occasionally pausing to look at the phone, or the framed picture of him and Gilbert on the mantelpiece. "Have you eaten?" he asked in concern.

"Huh? Oh, it's all right. I'm not hungry," Ludwig replied, running his hand through his hair in a half-hearted attempt to comb it into order.

Feliciano shook his head. "You haven't eaten a thing ever since Gilbert left! I'm going to make you pasta, and then you're going to eat some," he announced in the sternest tone he could muster before he made his way into Ludwig's kitchen. Did his friend have any pasta? A bit of poking around in the cabinets, and there it was, a packet of fettucine. Working on automatic, the little Italian greyhound gathered a few ingredients to make the sauce and began cooking, at the same time thinking about the current situation.

Gilbert had disappeared for two days now, leaving Ludwig frantic with worry. He had not called, nor was he at his friends' homes. Ludwig had gone to Antonio's and Francis', but neither turtle nor rooster saw or heard any sign of his older brother. Ludwig had even visited that strange lop-eared bunny Gilbert used to play with when he was little, but Arthur had not seen him either. Arthur had offered to do some sort of magical scrying to look for the runaway bunny, but Ludwig had politely declined the gesture, as well as some rather burnt scones for tea. All three promised to contact Ludwig should they come across Gilbert or find any clues of his whereabouts.

Done with the pasta and sauce, Feliciano doled out a generous portion of it on a plate for Ludwig and brought it to the living room. "Ve, here's the pasta," he said, setting it on the table. "You should try and eat a little of it, at least."

"Hmm? I'm not–" Ludwig began, but seeing the hurt look on Feliciano's face, sighed and said, "I'll eat it later."

Feliciano bit his lip. He was starting to feel more than just a little guilty over the whole mess; after all, he was the one who said he would help Gilbert escape. He had no idea that Gilbert would take it this far; he thought that the poor sheltered bunny only wanted to have an afternoon free to go play with other cute bunnies or something, not actually run away from home. Ludwig had checked Gilbert's room to find that some of his older brother's clothes and things were gone; Gilbert must have packed them in that backpack he brought over that day, just like Feliciano had suggested.

He sniffed loudly. It was all his fault!

Ludwig halted and turned to look at his friend. His eyes widened. "Feliciano, don't–"

_"Ve!_ It's all my fault your brother's gone missing and now you're all worried and you won't even eat my pasta and Gilbert's out there somewhere all scared and lonely and lost and some big scary thing's probably going to catch him and he's not here to enjoy any of my gelato and pasta–"

_"Feliciano!"_

"… ve?" He managed to stifle a rather piteous sob in mid-bawl.

Ludwig sighed and put a hand to his forehead. "I... I'll eat your pasta," he said weakly and sat down. He handed a handkerchief to Feliciano, who immediately put it to use, wiping tears from his eyes and cheeks then blowing his nose rather noisily.

"Thank you, Ludwig."

"No, you keep the handkerchief." Ludwig twirled a few strands of the fettucine around his fork, and under Feliciano's hopeful gaze, slowly began to eat. The taller canine had eaten several mouthfuls before he put his fork down, ignoring Felicano's disapproving look. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure!"

"Why did you help my brother?"

Feliciano winced slightly. "Ve... well, because it's good to help people?"

Ludwig glared at him.

He gulped and stared at his shoes, hoping to find inspiration in the Velcro straps fastening them. He had never figured out to tie shoelaces, much to the irritation of his older brother, who one day finally blew his top after Feliciano's umpteenth request for him to help tie the younger sibling's shoelaces. After thumping Feliciano on the head, Lovino had marched to his brother's shoe closet with a big pair of scissors, the sewing box, a large packet of Velcro and a very determined look in his face. Two hours later, Feliciano never had a reason to ask for help with shoelaces again.

"Well?" Ludwig prompted.

"He hated having to stay all cooped up at home. And having you follow him everywhere he went whenever you _do _let him out of the house. Ve, I _know_ I'm not smart enough to do important stuff like how you can, Ludwig, but I can tell that Gilbert's _really_ unhappy. I didn't like seeing him like that, so I thought maybe I'd help him so he can have a day all by himself."

Ludwig sighed.

"Are you angry with me?" Feliciano asked hesitantly.

Ludwig either ignored him, or did not even hear his question. "I didn't like doing that to him either," Ludwig said.

"Ve?"

"But father told me lots of times to take care of him, and to make sure that nothing happens to him."

"But that doesn't mean you have to make him stay in the house all the time!"

"He has his video games and laptop and god knows what else–"

"Ve, but I think he still needs more than that! Everyone needs to go and meet other people and make new friends and things! Even Lovi goes out to see his hat-wearing friends every other day, even though he says he hates to go meet them."

Ludwig let out another sigh. "You don't understand, Feliciano. Gilbert's not really like us canines." He turned to look at the little greyhound. "Feli," he said, "what is the first thing you think of when you see my big brother?"

"Ve, his cute ears? Oh, and that cute little fluffy tail! I've always wanted to touch it and see if it feels as soft as looks, but after that one time when we were kids your Papa saw me trying and then he got all scary and yelled at me I got really scared and never tried it again–"

"Precisely," Ludwig interrupted. "Do you know why our father never lets anyone touch Gilbert's tail?"

"Ve, no?"

Ludwig sat up straight, a gesture that Feliciano could not help but imitate. He just knew that Ludwig was going to explain Something Really Important, and explain the taller canine did. Fifteen minutes later, after a rather lengthy briefing, complete with helpful diagrams (he had no idea Ludwig had that white board and clip chart stowed under the couch, ve~) as well as a five-minute question and answer session, Feliciano was considerably enlightened. And distressed.

"Ve... _Ve!"_

"Yes."

"We need to find him quick!" Feliciano said, panicking.

"I know," Ludwig said weakly, "trust me, I know."


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'. Also, **nambnb **was kind enough to draw some fanart! Thanks heaps! :D You can find the link to it on my profile page.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 6**

Finished with his final client of the day, Ivan collected his earnings and toolbox before he headed for home. He whistled happily, satisfied with the day's work. While being a plumber was not exactly a glamorous job (although he was a _certified_ plumber mind you, he went to trade school and took the exams and everything), the income it provided was quite decent. It paid for his food and expenses, plus the occasional treat at the cinema or a fancy restaurant with his sisters. Besides, if he needed some extra cash, that strange masked cat at the downtown bazaar always had a job for him; all he needed to do was collect some money from some very frightened-looking people.

"You mean I just go to their houses and ask for them to pay their debts? And you will give me some money if I am successful?" he had asked in confusion when the masked cat first approached him about an assignment.

"Sure! You're the right person for the job! Tall, burly, scary-looking with a psychotic smile – perfect! Just remember to carry that pipe around!"

He had frowned at that a little; his elder sister told him that he had a very nice smile, not a psychotic one. But he had needed some cash then, for he knew that his sister was a little behind on her gas bill and he thought she would appreciate it if he loaned her the money. After all, she took care of him while he was growing up, working hard so she could afford to send him to trade school. That first extra job he took went well, and the cat was pleased enough to offer him another opportunity should he find himself in need of extra money.

Speaking of his sister, she told him to take good care of the little lost bunny he had found in the woods, yes? The poor thing had hurt his leg and Ivan had taken him home so the bear could nurse him back to health. Ivan had never seen such an adorable thing up close, and was more than a little surprised when Gilbert was not the shy creature he had expected.

Ivan wondered how would Gilbert greet him today when he returned from work. Even though the bunny had a rather foul mouth, it seemed that Gilbert was quite affectionate, rushing to hug him the moment he stepped inside the house yesterday. However, today he would make sure he stored his extra pipes in his toolbox instead of his coat to prevent a repeat of yesterday's bunny-bouncing-off-bear episode.

He did however, would like (very much, hee hee!) a repeat of Gilbert's reaction to the tail-squeezing. How cute!

Ivan realised that he must have gushed that out loud, for more than several passersby stared at him in surprise. Nevertheless, no one said a thing; after all, it was not wise to make rude or disparaging remarks at a bear, especially a tall bear hefting a rather mean-looking pipe on his shoulder.

He soon arrived home and after ensuring that he had no hard objects in his coat pockets, he unlocked the door and stepped inside the house. "I'm back!" he announced as he spread his arms wide, expecting a happy little bunny rushing to hug him. Therefore, it was quite a shock when he did not get the greeting he had imagined, but instead he got a very annoyed-looking bunny dumping a rather large bowl of stew on his head.

"Eh?"

"Are you fucking stupid?"

Ivan wiped stew off his face and stared at Gilbert, who stood in front of him, shaking with rage. "Is something wrong? Did the food turn bad?"

"Do you seriously expect me to eat that... that _thing?"_

Ivan blinked, puzzled. "What is wrong with cabbage stew?"

"It's got _nothing_ but cabbage in it! What the hell do you take me for? A – a cabbage-eater?"

Now Ivan was really confused. He was pretty sure that bunnies ate greens like cabbage or lettuce, yes? "Would you prefer carrots?" he offered.

"No, I don't want your fucking carrots!"

How odd. A rabbit that refused carrots? "Well, what would you like then?" asked Ivan.

_"Wurst!" _Gilbert yelled.

Ivan blinked again. "You want worst things?" Gilbert actually _wanted _to eat awful stuff? Strange; he was positive that rabbits were not scavengers.

Gilbert tugged at his hair in a gesture of frustration. "Argh! Fine, forget about the food for a second. Where the hell are my trousers?" he snarled, making a rather amusing sight dressed only in a pyjama top, plus a towel around his waist.

"Ah! Well, they were really dirty last night, so I put them in the wash! I couldn't leave you anything else to wear since I did not have any more clothes your size, and the ones you wore when I found you aren't dry yet!" Ivan explained.

Gilbert turned bright red, mortified. "Ah, forget it, I'm getting out of here!" he declared, then hobbled to the door, using one of Ivan's pipes as a cane.

"Wait, that's not a good idea–" Ivan began as Gilbert opened the door, but it was too late.

"Oh shit!" Gilbert blurted as a strong gust of freezing wind hit him squarely in his face, nearly driving him to his knees.

Ivan quickly scooped the stunned bunny into his arms and shut the door with a good kick. "Are you all right?" he asked in concern.

Gilbert blinked once, then twice. "What the hell was that?"

"The weather?"

"What, it's winter here?"

Ivan laughed, amused. "What a funny creature you are! Of course it is not winter yet. Winter is a long way off!" Seeing Gilbert's confused expression, he added, "The weather here is a bit strange for outsiders, yes? They always complain that it is cold, but this is quite normal for us here. Still, I think it is not a good idea for you to go out just yet, not with your hurt leg!"

"Aha," Gilbert muttered, then flinched in embarrassment when his stomach made a very loud growl.

"Now now, let's see about making you some food, yes?" Ivan said, chuckling as he easily carried Gilbert deeper into house and headed for the kitchen. "What would you like?"

"Something with meat in it," Gilbert grumbled.

A carnivore rabbit? Ivan shook his head, smiling. "I have sausages, I think. Will that do?"

"Whatever."

Ivan chuckled again. The bear was amused at how quickly his guest had turned docile, compared to the angry ball of white fur earlier. The poor thing was probably still shaken, Ivan decided as he bent his head down to pet Gilbert on the head, and then lightly scratched those cute fuzzy ears for a bit.

That sweet, lovely scent he had smelled last night was still faintly lingering in Gilbert's soft hair, and Ivan found himself breathing it in.

-x-

Gilbert felt like hitting his head against the kitchen table. Actually, he amended, he felt like hitting _Ivan's_ head, because that would be far more cool. In fact he could have, for he was awesome enough to take down a bear, but strangely enough, he did not. And he was not sure why.

What the hell was wrong with him? Gilbert frowned, then bit rather savagely on the small piece of sausage on his fork, drawing a raised eyebrow from Ivan. He had it all planned earlier; when Ivan got home, he was going to dunk the bear with that disgusting cabbage gunk, beat the idiot on the head with a steel pipe, plus a few good kicks before he would leave the house. No wait, he would steal Ivan's pants first because dammit, it was starting to feel more than just a little bit_ airy_ down _there_ with just a towel around his waist, _then_ leave.

He only got as far as dumping the bowl of stew on Ivan's head.

When the bear just stared back in confusion, liquid dripping all over his face, Gilbert just froze. Well, perhaps not exactly froze, but he simply could not get his legs to move; it seemed as if his limbs were rendered useless under Ivan's gaze.

Gilbert pursed his lips in thought as he tried to recall if there were any similar occasions in his childhood, then frowned again when he could not think of any. Was this one of those (completely not awesome) latent rabbit instincts? His father had once mentioned something about the general tendency of prey animals to freeze when perceiving danger. But Ivan was not much of a danger, he told himself; Ivan was only a boring, weird bear who worked as a plumber and talked funny.

Besides, _he_ was not prey, Gilbert reminded himself, he was just awesome.

Thankfully his vocal cords had still worked; since he could not move his legs, he had resorted to verbal abuse instead. Fortunately after a fair bit of yelling, he could finally use his legs again. Still, that gust of cold air that greeted him when he opened the door, he admitted reluctantly, made him speechless; heck, anyone else would have ended up being rendered speechless if his vital regions were going to _freeze._

Gilbert frowned. So much for running outside to freedom then. He was awesome, sure, but he was not completely out of his mind to flee into that freezing weather without proper clothes on. He had to rethink his escape plan entirely, and was kept busy with thinking that he allowed himself to be carried like a little pup into the kitchen.

Well _of course_ that was the only reason he allowed Ivan to do that!

"Want some more?" Ivan asked, interrupting his train of thought.

He shook his head in reply and pushed his empty plate away. "I'm going to sleep," he announced.

Sleep. That was about the few things he could do in this house other than being bored out of his cute bunny skull.

Eat. Sleep. Figure out ways to seriously incapacitate weird bear-plumbers. Plan his escape. Figure out awesome ways to beat up all plumbers he came across after his escape. Remembering just how _good _it felt having his tail–

Wait, where did that come from?

"Are you all right?" Ivan asked, tilting his head slightly in concern and puzzlement. "You look a bit feverish."

"I'm fine!" Gilbert snarled before he hobbled out of the kitchen and into the bedroom, stomping his good foot all the way.

-x-

Ivan winced as Gilbert made the most awful racket on his way out with his cane-and-foot-stomping. Hopefully there was no damage to the floor with the _clack-STOMP-clack-STOMP_ the bunny was making. Ivan frowned. Did he say anything to upset his guest? His sister always said that he was not really good in dealing with other people. But he was trying his best, he really was!

Perhaps he should stop by his elder sister's farm and ask for some advice when he finished work tomorrow? He thought about it as he washed and dried the dishes. Yes, maybe she would have some idea as to why Gilbert was angry with him.

Ivan also made a mental note to stop by the butcher's tomorrow after work. Gilbert had eaten a fair amount of sausages and Ivan would have to replenish his larder. He would also need to buy some more meat products since his little guest was not a total herbivore, yes?

Done tidying up in the kitchen, Ivan headed for the bedroom, but was surprised when the door was locked. He knocked on the door. "Gilbert? I need to come in!"

"Screw you!"

Ivan's eyes narrowed. Who was Gilbert to lock him out of his own bedroom, yes? He was just about to kick the door in (since repairing it would not be expensive anyway, as he could get a tradesman discount) when he remembered how his elder sister told him that he should learn to control his temper.

Now Ivan, he could practically hear her voice while he recalled how she would tilt her head and wave one finger as she smiled, you need to learn to be patient with people! Or else you would never make friends, and you do want to make friends, don't you?

He sighed. Oh well, he would just have to shower in the other bathroom and sleep in the spare room for the night. He could get a fresh change of clothes in the morning. After all, he had all the room keys with him, yes?

-x-

Ivan was an early riser; ever since he was a little cub, he always got up at dawn so he could help his elder sister with some simple chores at the farm. The habit stayed even though he no longer lived at the farm, but he still liked waking up early so he could take his time getting ready for work, and then tidy up the house a bit, or perhaps polish some of the pipes and faucets in his collection.

Gilbert however, was definitely not used to waking up early; Ivan knew that the bunny would still be asleep when he had to get a fresh shirt. Still, it would be polite to try knocking on the door first, yes? When no answer came, Ivan shrugged and reached into his coat pocket to retrieve a bunch of keys. He selected one and unlocked the door.

"Gilbert?" he said. Strangely enough, the bed was empty, but all the bedclothes were missing. Concerned, he walked inside and only then noticed the pile of sheets, blankets and one sleeping bunny on the floor.

Gilbert was sound asleep, snug and comfortable in the odd warren of bedding with his head sticking out of one end of the pile, resting on a pillow, while a pale bare leg was stuck out the other end. Ivan thought that it would have been an absolutely adorable sight, if he were not snoring loudly and drooling on the pillow. Still, the floor was rather cold, and it was probably not good for the bunny to continue sleeping like that.

After a fair bit of fiddling about with the mess of bedclothes, Ivan came to the conclusion that Gilbert was also a very sound sleeper, for the bunny did not even twitch when he was carried to bed. Instead, Gilbert simply rolled over and out of his cocoon of blankets, burying his face in the mattress.

Ivan blinked. The towel Gilbert wore around his waist had loosened off; the rabbit now only had his pyjama shirttail very strategically covering certain lower areas, and even then that fluffy white tail was tempting Ivan. It was so cute that it demanded to be touched, yes?

Just like last night, Gilbert relaxed and started making the most adorable noises, and that lovely scent Ivan had found so interesting grew stronger. Fascinated, Ivan lay down next to the dozing bunny and increased his ministrations on Gilbert's tail. Gilbert's moans grew louder and the bunny turned around, and Ivan carefully pulled him closer. By now Gilbert's eyes were half-closed while his lips were parted. Feeling strangely curious and thrilled at the same time, Ivan hesitated for a moment before he leant closer and kissed Gilbert lightly on the lips.

Gilbert's eyes suddenly opened wide. Was he awake now? Judging from the way Gilbert was now rubbing against him, making all those cute little noises, the bunny was surely fully conscious. And just like last night, Gilbert was hard and Ivan dutifully took care of his predicament with a smile, before the bear ran his hands soothingly down Gilbert's back as his guest trembled in his arms. It was a while before Gilbert's breathing finally steadied, and the bunny mumbled something as he looked up at Ivan.

"Gilbert?" he said, feeling a little worried. Was Gilbert furious with him?

There was an odd look on Gilbert's face, but it was definitely not anger, Ivan decided, as Gilbert pushed him down and to his shock and delight, kissed him. It was a rather clumsy and sloppy attempt, but Ivan figured that they could work on that some more, yes?

In fact, they worked on that small matter so much that Ivan showed up rather late for his first work appointment that morning.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 7**

Ivan quickened his pace, at the same time adjusting his hold on his shopping bags. He had done a little bit of marketing after his last client. First was a quick detour to buy some meat and a good deal of sausages from the butcher's. The place was run by two strange, pale blond elk; the tall, silent one had stayed at the counter to wrap up Ivan's sausages while the shorter, smiling one had gone to the back, and Ivan heard the unmistakable sound of frantic chopping in time to several gruesome shouts of _"Hakkaa päälle!" _before he returned with Ivan's request for some freshly minced meat.

Honestly, Ivan had no idea why people thought _he_ was strange.

Next was a trip to the local outfitter to get Gilbert some clothes. As much as Ivan liked seeing his adorable guest in a pyjama top and a towel, it was probably not good for Gilbert to walk around like that; he could catch a cold, Ivan figured. He hoped that Gilbert was in a better mood when he got home; he certainly did not want to sleep in the spare room again tonight, since it only had a mattress instead of a proper bed.

Oh well. All that was left was to visit his sister's farm.

She greeted him warmly when he arrived, kissing him on both cheeks before suddenly she started trembling and began apologising, almost in tears. He quickly assured her that she could take her time paying him back for that loan for her gas bill, and that he was here for another reason. Relieved, she invited him inside for a little chat.

"Is something wrong, Vanya?" she asked after she offered him something warm to drink.

"It is about Gilbert," Ivan said.

"Oh, is the little bunny ill?"

"I am not sure. He seems to be angry with me most of the time." Ivan scratched his head. "And he keeps doing strange things."

"Well, he is injured, so I think that explains why he's angry. Some people have very bad tempers when they are hurt, yes? Now, what sort of strange things are you talking about?"

Ivan told her about how he found Gilbert asleep in that odd cocoon-like structure made out of bedclothes. She pursed her lips in thought before she replied, "Well, he _is_ a bunny. And bunnies like to sleep in warrens, so I suppose he was just behaving like how bunnies should. Since he could not dig a hole, he just made a warren out of your blankets and bedsheets for him to sleep in."

"Bunnies are also supposed to eat cabbage, but he dumped a whole bowl of cabbage stew on my head."

"Maybe it just was not tasty? Did you get all the ingredients right?"

"I'm sure I did," Ivan said rather defensively.

"Hmm. Perhaps you should give him something to do to help take his mind off things?"

Ivan thought on that for a while. The first thing that popped into his head was doing things to Gilbert's tail, but perhaps his sister was thinking of something different. "Such as?" he asked.

"Well, just something to do in the house. I know he's got an injured leg, but it wouldn't hurt for him to walk around and do some work. Maybe some simple chores?"

"Simple chores?"

"Well, stuff that doesn't require him to walk or stand a lot. We don't want to worsen his injury. Or you could ask him what he likes to do in his free time. Maybe he has a hobby that would keep him occupied!"

"I will give it a try. Thank you very much!"

-x-

"Ve, Ludwig... are you sure about this?"

"Well, you could go home, Feliciano. I told you that you didn't have to come along."

The little Italian greyhound shook his head. "No, it was my fault Gilbert's gone missing! I want to help too!" he insisted, a rather determined look on his face.

"All right. But just leave the talking to me." Ludwig smoothed his hair back and took a deep breath before he knocked on the door. A few moments later the door opened, revealing a lop-eared bunny with rather impressive eyebrows. "Hello Arthur," he greeted.

"Oh, it's you. Won't you come in?"

"Thank you," Ludwig replied and followed Arthur inside, while a nervous Feliciano followed close behind the _Schäferhund_, one hand clinging tightly to his tail.

"What can I do for you?" Arthur asked as he poured Ludwig a cup of tea once they were all seated in the living room.

"It's about Gilbert."

"Ah. Well, I haven't come across any news of your brother, I'm afraid."

Ludwig nodded. "Well, actually I wanted to talk about your offer to, uh, you know – _look _for my brother." He did not really believe in the supernatural things the lop-eared bunny practised, but he was desperate enough to try all options he had available to him.

Arthur brightened. "Of course I'll be happy to help you. But I'll need something of your brother's – a personal item. It would make things easier."

Ludwig nodded again; he had read up a little on the subject (_A Beginner's Guide to the Art of Scrying_ was a surprise find in the bookstore) and so came prepared. He reached inside his pocket and handed to Arthur a small, chick-shaped soft toy. It had been a favourite of Gilbert's while they were growing up, and from time to time Ludwig caught his elder brother holding it in his hands when he went to bed. "Will this do?"

Arthur raised one eyebrow, but did not comment on the little plushie. Instead, he nodded and said, "This will be fine. Shall we get started? All right, follow me. I'll need to do this in my workshop in the basement."

"Ve, excuse me..."

"Yes?"

Feliciano smiled weakly. "Could I use your bathroom first?"

"Oh, of course. Just down the hall, then the second door on your right."

"Thanks!" he said before he sped off.

Ludwig followed Arthur to the lop-eared bunny's workshop, where he was instructed to stand in front of a large black pot sitting on a tripod. The pot was filled almost to the brim with water. Arthur put on a black robe and lit the candles surrounding the pot in a circle, then went to stand on the other side of the pot. "All right, any questions before I start?"

"Will I be able to see the images in the pot, or only you can see them?"

"Hard to say. Sometimes it works with other people, sometimes it doesn't. Won't hurt to give it a try, though. Ready? All right, let's begin."

Ludwig watched as Arthur closed his eyes and muttered something under his breath as he moved one hand over the pot in a series of circles, while his other hand clung tightly to Gilbert's little stuffed toy. He repeated the gestures for about a minute before he finally moved his hand away and opened his eyes. "There," he said softly. "Can you see it?"

Ludwig gazed into the pot, hoping that he would be able to see his brother. At first he saw nothing but the water and his own reflection, and Arthur must have noticed his disappointment since the bunny said, "Try to relax. I doubt you'll be able to see if you're awfully tense like that."

Ludwig took a few deep breaths, closed his eyes for a long moment and then opened them again. He looked into the pot and after a while, he started to see a fuzzy, but unmistakable image of his brother. He would recognise those white bunny ears anywhere. "It's Gilbert! But the image is not too clear, can you fix that?"

"This is a scrying pot, Ludwig, not satellite TV," Arthur said in a rather amused tone.

"Oh." Ludwig peered harder into the pot. Gilbert seemed to be lying in a huge bed, sound asleep under a layer of blankets. He did not seem hurt, but it was quite hard to be certain with the grainy image.

"Well, at least he seems to be in a safe place," Arthur said, echoing the thoughts in Ludwig's head, "thank goodness for that!"

"Is it possible to find out where exactly is that place?" he asked, not caring if he sounded desperate, because he was. Even though Gilbert seemed to be all right, he _had_ to get his brother home.

"I'll try," Arthur said almost soothingly, try to calm the panicked canine. "This is a bit hard, so we'll need to concentrate. If we lose our concentration, I won't be able to do this for a while."

"Understood."

-x-

Feliciano carefully made his way down the staircase leading to the basement, occasionally shuddering at the rather scary-looking symbols on the brick walls. "Ve? Anyone there?" he called out as he peered into the doorway.

Ludwig and Arthur were standing near a big pot of water, staring into it with such intense expressions that only puzzled Feliciano. Why were they looking into that pot like that? Maybe they were upset? Or hungry?

Hungry... that's it!

Feliciano brightened once he figured out what was going on, and then promptly did the proper thing to be done whenever there was a pot of water around.

He trotted towards the pot and tossed in a packet of spaghetti.

There was a symphony of enraged yells from the other two in the room, and Feliciano gulped as he backed away. "Um... ve? We're going to cook pasta for dinner, weren't we?" he said nervously when both Ludwig and Arthur glared at him, their hands twitching in rather blood-curdling gestures.

Why were they so angry with him?

Both Ludwig's and Arthur's left eyebrows twitched.

"You _effin'_ sod–"

"Feliciano, _you–"_

He was not quite sure what both of them yelled at him after that, for he was too busy demonstrating to them in person why Italian greyhounds were known for running.

-x-

Gilbert grumbled as he sat on the couch, a blanket around his shoulders. He eyed the rather decrepit clock on the living room wall and found himself wondering why Ivan was over an hour late; the bear was usually home by five-thirty. He snorted and pulled the blanket tighter as he laid himself down, drawing his knees to his chest as he huddled in the warm fleece. It was a strange yet comforting gesture; he could not recall doing so before.

Maybe it was another one of those stupid rabbit instincts in him starting to surface? He wondered why _now,_ of all times, they chose to wake from their rabbity cryogenic slumber or whatever it was, and pop into his currently not-so-awesome life to say hi. He had found himself craving for a carrot stick this afternoon, and had successfully resisted that stupid urge by finishing a few more of those sausages.

At least Ivan had left him his clothes this morning, as well as a decent meal instead of that disgusting cabbage slop–

Wait, wait, wait! Gilbert shook his head violently.

Why was he starting to think that Ivan was rather decent after all? The bear was anything but, especially after what happened early this morning. He was having a rather _nice_ dream – he fought to stop himself from blushing furiously, but in vain – which turned even more awesome, just in like those porn DVDs his little brother hid in the closet. He had been puzzled when the person he was with had suddenly turned into Ivan, but it had felt so good then he had not bothered to think about it much.

Until of course, Ivan had pushed him away, the bear panicking about being late to work. That was when Gilbert realised that he was no longer dreaming, and he had just spent a great deal of time trying to shove his tongue down Ivan's throat–

Gilbert thumped the side of his head with one fist. "Shit, that hurt!" he exclaimed. Well of course it hurt, his punches were awesome, after all. Nevertheless, he had better – no, more awesome things to do, such as kicking Ivan in the nads when that wretched bear walked through the front door, then run for home.

Home.

As much as Gilbert hated to admit it, he was homesick.

He wondered how his little brother was doing. "West is probably worried sick about me," he muttered. At least when his brother kept him indoors, he had lots of stuff to amuse himself with, but here? There was nothing to do. He had explored the house earlier; most of the rooms were still locked. He did find a small library of sorts, but the books there were all in a funny language he could not understand – why were some of the alphabet printed backwards? And no umlauts either; anything without umlauts were absolutely not awesome, he decided.

Correction: he was really homesick _and_ bored.

-x-

Ivan unlocked the front door and was about to step inside before he recalled what happened yesterday. Sure, Gilbert was in a good mood this morning – hee hee! – but what if the cute little bunny was angry now? He cautiously opened the door a crack. Nothing happened, so he opened the door just enough for him to slide his shopping bags and toolbox inside the house. Again, nothing happened. Still, no harm in taking precautions, yes?

He took a deep breath and then threw the door wide open. "I'm home!" he announced, then instinctively threw his hands in front of his face, anticipating a bowl of soup thrown at him. When nothing of the sort came, he slowly lowered his hands. He blinked.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Gilbert growled. The bunny was standing in front of Ivan with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Um, nothing?" Ivan said, smiling. At least Gilbert had not resorted to acts of violence – _ow!_ Oh well, at least that kick to his knee did not hurt much; Gilbert did not put much effort into it, it seemed.

"What's all that stuff?" Gilbert asked, looking at the bags near the doorway.

"I went to buy some things for you!"

The bunny brightened somewhat and hobbled over to the bags. "More sausages, but it's better than nothing," he said as he peeked through the bags. "Hey, new clothes!"

"I hope they fit you, yes?"

Gilbert had taken out a pair of trousers and was holding it up in the air, eyeing it critically. "It looks all right."

"I even asked the shop to alter it for you. You know, for your tail."

"Oh." Gilbert squirmed a little and his cheeks turned slightly pink. He squirmed some more, and Ivan wondered if he were about to implode when the bunny mumbled, "Thanks."

"You're welcome. Are you hungry? I can cook something."

"Yeah. Sure."

-x-

"Chores?" Gilbert repeated, his fork paused in mid-air.

"Yes. I discussed it with my sister. She thinks that perhaps it is a good idea for you to do some things around the house. I know that it is not quite proper, since you are a guest, but she believes that you need to move around a bit. Nothing too strenuous. Just some simple chores."

"Like what?"

"Let's see, maybe things I had to do when I was a little cub? Back then, I helped my sister to clean the house. I would lift all the heavy furniture like the table and cupboard while she would sweep underneath–"

"You call lugging _furniture_ around _simple_ chores?"

"I was a very strong child," Ivan said rather proudly. "But I suppose you are right, maybe bunnies are not meant for lifting furniture about. I do not know. What kind of chores did you have to do back home?"

Gilbert thought on that for a bit. He basically did not have to do much at home, since Ludwig basically did everything. He just did stuff like tossing his dirty clothes in the laundry basket (when he felt like it), playing video games (because they were awesome and so was he) and occasionally organising his diaries; he had a lot of them, before his brother convinced him to permanently switch to blogging online.

"What's blogging?"

He groaned. Ivan just had to be one of _those. _"It's like writing a diary."

"Oh. So basically you never did any chores around the house? Not even when you were a little_ little_ bunny?"

"No, because bunnies are too cute and awesome to do boring stuff like chores. Although I think my father did get me to do stuff like wiping windows and vacuuming. But after a while he told me to quit bothering about that boring crap and just take out the garbage every Tuesday and Thursday."

"Why did he tell you to stop?"

"He said that it wasn't good for bunnies to bend over a lot."

"Oh."

-x-

Ivan tidied up in the kitchen while Gilbert grumbled his way to the bedroom. Once he was done, Ivan went to the bedroom and was pleasantly surprised that it was left unlocked. Gilbert was probably already asleep, judging from the mound of blankets on the bed and the light snores emanating from it.

Ivan giggled when he heard Gilbert distinctly mutter for ice cream in his sleep. Still amused, the bear showered and got ready for bed. He climbed into the bed and wondered how he was going to sleep; Gilbert had practically taken all the bedclothes for himself. Maybe some rearranging was in order, yes?

He carefully tugged one end of a blanket and managed to unravel a significant length of it for himself. But his sister did say that bunnies liked to sleep in burrows and warrens, and Gilbert was probably going along with his instincts as best he could...

Ivan decided to inch closer and put his arms around the cocooned bunny before drawing the blanket over them both. There; now it really was like a rabbit's burrow, all cozy and warm, Ivan decided. Gilbert muttered something in his sleep and nuzzled closer to Ivan's chest, and the bear could not help but smile.

He probably slept with that smile on his face all the way into morning.

* * *

**Additional note:**

_Hakkaa päälle!_ - Finnish battle cry; means something like 'hack them up'. For some reason I think all the Nordics yell Viking war cries whenever they're chopping up stuff in the kitchen. But that's just me.

… I've now an urge to draw Denmark chopping up onions with a great big axe_._


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 8  
**

Ivan woke up the next morning feeling rather warm and a little bit smothered. He supposed it was inevitable, as he dreamt that he was being chased by a huge fleece blanket with very sharp teeth and claws. He opened his eyes, wondering what was the odd, furry sensation against his mouth. A few groggy moments later, he blinked when he discovered that it was half of a pair of bunny ears.

Gilbert was sprawled on top of him, snoring softly as the bunny slept. Apparently Gilbert had somehow wriggled out of his makeshift warren of bedclothes sometime during the night – or perhaps Ivan had tugged the bedclothes off in his sleep, for the bear had also dreamt he was peeling a giant potato before that monstrous fleece blanket had appeared. Gilbert's head was tucked under Ivan's chin, with one soft furry ear lying against Ivan's mouth and nose.

Cute, but it also tickled. Ivan sneezed. Gilbert however, did not even move.

"Um, Gilbert?" Ivan said as he gently shook the sleeping bunny by the shoulder. Gilbert simply grunted in reply.

Feeling just a little mischievous (and wanting to get even a little, for his sleeping guest was partly to blame for his strange nightmare) Ivan carefully reached down and placed his hand on the white tail sticking out of Gilbert's new pyjama bottoms. Ivan was greatly fascinated by that tail. It was so white, warm and soft. Ivan thought it was quite possibly the softest thing he had ever touched. And the lovely noises Gilbert made when he stroked that soft tail; it aroused certain strange, but not unpleasant sensations in the bear, especially when Gilbert would breathe rather heavily and would start smelling so _good,_ since Ivan would feel one _very_ particular sensation that shot down to the bear's crotch.

Gilbert was already reacting to his soft touches and Ivan was smiling as he started contemplating on whether he should start doing this as a daily morning ritual. It certainly put the adorably grumpy bunny in a better mood when he had done it yesterday. Ivan thought it would be wonderful if Gilbert would welcome him home in a nicer way.

Ivan had very little friends or acquaintances; he supposed it was because he was a bear, after all. Almost everyone just kept a good distance away from him most of the time. If it were not for his line of work, perhaps he would hardly ever have any form of contact with anyone. He was quite excited when he had brought Gilbert home, thinking that the bunny would be some nice company while he nursed Gilbert back to health. While perhaps they could try to improve that 'nice company' part a little bit, he certainly enjoyed having someone around the house, just like when he was still living with his siblings. He missed his sisters, but he supposed that it was natural for each of them to try and make a living on their own.

"Keep going," Gilbert grumbled, interrupting his thoughts.

"Eh?" Ivan blinked. He must have been so lost in thought he had not realised that he had ceased stroking Gilbert's tail.

"I said," Gilbert growled, "keep going."

"Oh," Ivan replied. After a few moments, he asked, "You like that?"

"Hmmm... Feels good. Dunno why."

"And if I did this?" Ivan squeezed rather hard on the tail in his hand. The bear was completely unprepared for Gilbert's reaction, which was to let out the most _delicious-soundin_g moan the bear had ever heard in his life and Ivan came to the firm conclusion that Gilbert had really liked that, for Gilbert was now pushing hard against him and was also trying to show Ivan what he had learnt in the previous morning.

Ivan let Gilbert do as he pleased for a little while, enjoying the bunny's spirited attempts at kissing him into submission before he rolled over to pin Gilbert to the bed, all the while mindful of Gilbert's injured limb.

Gilbert on the other hand, seemed to be more occupied with other things than his foot. In fact, he was grumbling on how hot it was, in between their exchange of kisses. Well, there was only one solution for that, yes?

Ivan began unbuttoning Gilbert's pyjama top, but Gilbert was not patient enough to reciprocate the exact way, for he simply tugged so hard on Ivan's that the buttons were ripped off. The rest of their clothes followed and soon Ivan found himself with a rather needy, impatient and naked Gilbert in his arms. That needed to be remedied as well, he thought.

He blinked. Was he really going to... to...

"Will you just get on with it?" Gilbert snarled.

Did Gilbert even _know_ what he was asking for? A rather savage growl, followed by an equally savage bite at Ivan's neck indicated that yes, he was. Ivan beamed.

_"Urrah!" _ he yelled in triumph, one fist in the air, before he grinned and bent down to do as he was told.

-x-

Ivan was humming softly as Gilbert dozed next to him, one hand wrapped around the bear's waist. As much as Ivan enjoyed this, he really needed to get out of bed so he could get ready for work, as well as prepare Gilbert's meals for the rest of the day. Oh, and change the sheets.

"Um, Gilbert? I need to go to work," Ivan said.

Gilbert's eyes were still closed, but he growled, "Who said that you could go?"

Ivan stared at him. "Eh?"

"I'm not done yet," Gilbert declared, opening his eyes. There was a rather predatory look in them, Ivan noticed.

He wondered if he should be afraid.

"But Gilbert–"

"I said, I wasn't done yet!"

Not done yet? Ivan sat up. "But I'll be late for my first client – _eek!"_ Ivan began, then yelped when Gilbert tugged him down sharply by his neck.

Forget late, Ivan _completely _missed his first two work appointments for that day. Although he had to placate his two very angry clients by offering to waive labour charges, he thought that it was more than worth it.

-x-

"You seem very happy today. Did something good happen to you?"

Ivan laughed, while his elder sister smiled. "You might say that!" he replied as he handed her a paper bag; she had asked him to do a little bit of shopping for her after he was done with work. He had been a bit surprised when the usual two pale elk at the butcher's were absent, and in their place were two other elk, as well as a puffin. Ivan was amused when these elk were unlike the ones he normally dealt with; the tall one was the noisy, smiling one, while the shorter one remained silent. The puffin, on the other hand, had simply ignored everyone else.

"That's good! Come in, come in. And how is your guest? Is he recovering as he should? I hope you haven't made him do anything strenuous that would make his leg worse."

Ivan pursed his lips as he thought of what happened this morning. He was quite sure he was careful that first time, but Gilbert had been more than enthusiastic in the second, third and fourth – he blushed – so he was not quite sure if all that moving about was considered strenuous enough to aggravate Gilbert's injury.

"Ivan?"

"Well, I didn't ask him to do any chores, but he was doing lots of other things!"

She looked at him curiously. "I'd better come to your house and see how he is."

"Oh, that is good. He likes you, I think."

"Really?"

"Yes! He said you have a big heart, remember?"

She smiled. "That's nice."

-x-

"I'm home!" Ivan announced, then quickly added before any objects or any other physical attacks were directed towards him, "Gilbert, my sister's here too!"

A rapid staccato of Gilbert's _clack-STOMP-clack-STOMP _cane-and-foot-stomping was all they heard before the bunny came into the living room. He was munching on something as he held his makeshift cane with one hand, and had an opened jar of peanut butter in the other. Gilbert brightened when he saw that Ivan was not alone. "Hey!" he greeted.

"Why do you have that peanut butter with you?" Ivan asked as he indicated Gilbert to sit down, while he went to get the footstool.

"It was the only way that I could eat that damn carrot. Dip it in peanut butter. I may have a craving to eat it, but I don't have to actually taste that stupid thing," Gilbert said, at the same time glaring at Ivan, as if daring the bear to make any comment.

Ivan wisely kept quiet about the issue. "My sister wants to see how you're feeling."

Gilbert nodded and just like the other day, slowly began to turn pink. It puzzled Ivan. Why was the bunny so docile and well-behaved whenever his sister was present? Was it because Gilbert thought she had a big heart? Well, he had a big heart too – he took Gilbert in, yes? And fed and clothed him rather nicely as well, Ivan thought, as he watched his sister fussed over Gilbert, placing the bunny's cast foot on the stool.

"How is your leg? Does it hurt when you move?" she asked.

"A little. But not all the time," Gilbert said.

"Is the cast bothering you too much? No? Good. I see my little brother gave you a cane to help you move around. I think it'd be better if he made you some crutches. We want to make sure you don't put any weight on your foot." She eyed him critically before she asked, "Do you have a fever?"

"Huh?"

"Your face is a bit red." She leant closer to him and felt his forehead with the back of her hand. "And you're feeling rather warm, too."

"Huh? Oh. Whaa?"

"Wait, what are these little bruises on your neck? I don't think these were here the last time I came. And I can see that there are some on your shoulders too! What happened? Vanya, were you being mean to your guest–"

Both Ivan and Gilbert coughed before they protested in unison, "No!"

"Now both of you are turning red. You boys are so strange!"

-x-

Once convinced that Gilbert was doing quite well, the Wisent with the big heart (among other things) went home, but not before issuing some more instructions to her younger brother about Gilbert's care. Ivan had dutifully noted them all down.

Both Ivan and Gilbert were having a meal in the kitchen when the bunny asked, "What does your sister do?"

"My elder sister? She runs the family farm."

"With your younger sister?"

"No, little Natalia works in the city."

"Oh, what does she do for a living?"

"She's a hacker!" Ivan said proudly.

"A hacker? Cool. At least _someone_ in your family is smart enough to work with computers and stuff."

"What does her job have to do with computers?" Ivan said, puzzled. "She works in a meat-packing plant."

"Wait, a meat-packing plant?" Gilbert said, confused. "I thought you said she's a hacker."

"Well, yes. Her job is to take a big knife, and then someone hands her some really big cuts of meat so she can hack them to–"

"Never mind."

-x-

Arthur opened the door and looked as if he were about to invite Ludwig in when the lop-eared rabbit spotted Feliciano, who was trying to hide behind the _Schäferhund_. "Forget it!" Arthur snarled and would have slammed the door shut, if Ludwig had not prevented him from doing so.

Holding the door open, Ludwig said, "I'm sorry about what happened the last time we were here, but I would really like to try looking for my brother again."

"And have that little mutt ruin it? No, thank you. Now good day–"

"I'll keep an eye on him. Now help me find my brother!"

Arthur's gaze softened a little, but hardened again when Feliciano peeked from behind Ludwig and waved a nervous hand. "Ve?"

"You!"

"… ve?"

Ignoring Ludwig's disapproving look, Arthur said to the Italian greyhound, "You won't do anything ridiculous like the last time you were here. Do you know why? No? Because if you decide to do anything stupid, I shall cut you up into tiny, tiny pieces. And do you know what I am going to do with those tiny, tiny pieces? I shall cook them up and then _eat_ them."

"Ve... you don't need to do that," Feliciano sniffed rather piteously, trembling, "if you're that hungry I could cook you some pasta..."

"And there will be no mention of pasta in this house! Is that understood?"

Feliciano gulped and nodded.

-x-

Some moments later all three of them stood in Arthur's workshop. Arthur and Ludwig would have started with the scrying, if it were not for Feliciano, who kept interrupting things with his comments and observations.

"Ve, what's all this stuff in the little pots and jars? Do you cook with them? All these weird roots and things! No wonder your food is terrible..."

"Will you please keep him quiet?" Arthur grumbled to Ludwig, "I can't do anything with all the noise he's making. No, never mind – I have a better idea." Before Ludwig could stop him, the lop-eared bunny then proceeded to grab Feliciano by the collar, shoved him out of the workshop, closed the door and bolted it shut. "There! Now, shall we begin?"

Once Arthur was done with his ritual, both of them gazed into the pot. A few long moments passed before Arthur shook his head and remarked, "That's strange."

Ludwig frowned. "I don't see anything. It's all smoke and mist. Is the pot... broken?"

"Don't be silly. What I meant was, we're actually seeing Gilbert's location. I can feel it, but like you said, it's all misty. Maybe he's in a fog or something?"

Ludwig's eyes widened. "Or what if he's trapped in a fire?"

"No, no!" Arthur hastily assured him. "It doesn't feel like he's in any kind of danger."

"Can you, uh, get sound on this... thing?"

"This isn't satellite TV – oh never mind, let's give it a go." Arthur took a deep breath before he gave the scrying pot a few firm thumps at one side. "Serves me right for buying the bog-standard pot; I knew I should have bought the deluxe model, that one's got better speakers..." he muttered.

"I think I can hear the sound of... running water?" Ludwig said, hesitating a little.

"Yes, I believe you're right."

They blinked, then stared at each other.

"He's in pain! I can hear him groan!" Ludwig announced.

Arthur shook his head. "I can hear someone else too, Ludwig. And I don't think your brother's in pain." He coughed, while his cheeks turned red. "Actually, I think Gilbert's uh, enjoying the whole experience."

"Whatever do you mean – oh. _Oh." _Ludwig blinked, then blushed. "Could you... try to pinpoint his location this time?"

"I'll do my best."

"Oh, and could you... turn the sound off?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

-x-

"Gilbert?"

"What?"

"That was really nice, but I think we used up all the hot water. Let's clean up and get out of the shower, yes?"

"Yeah."

"Can we do this again tomorrow?"

"… maybe."


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

Also, **M.D. Off-Red** drew some awesome fanart for the fic! You can view it (and another equally awesome one she did for _That's What You Get_) at my profile page. :D Thanks very much!

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 9**

Ivan hummed softly as he walked. He had finished his last job for the day earlier than he had expected, so he thought that perhaps he would go and do a little shopping in town before he returned home. Gilbert had mentioned a few days ago that he liked to keep a diary, so the bear decided that he should get his guest one, or at least something to write in. That would make the bunny happy, Ivan figured, smiling.

A happy Gilbert would not, out of sheer boredom, hurl crockery at him when he returned home.

A happy Gilbert would probably not kick him out of bed in the middle of the night either. While Gilbert's right foot was wrapped in a cast, his left foot was perfectly fine and not to mention perfectly capable of kicking Ivan almost halfway across the room in his sleep. After that one occasion when the bear had foolishly unraveled a great deal of the blanket and sheets around the bunny, Ivan wisely left Gilbert's habit of cocooning himself in bedclothes alone.

A happy Gilbert would also be more fun to play with.

When Gilbert was happy, he did not seem to mind Ivan touching his tail, and sometimes Ivan thought he even looked forward to it – and what usually came afterward.

Ivan looked forward to that too. A lot.

He soon reached the sole bookshop in town and after a while, left the shop with his purchases; a rather thick diary with a soft, black leather cover, as well as a few pens that had pictures of little rabbits and birds on the caps. Gilbert would likely be pleased with the pens; the bunny seemed to like 'cute' things, judging by his choice of underwear. He had worn chick-patterned boxers when Ivan found him.

Let's see, what else? Gilbert had mentioned something about video games, but such modern things were not available in this little town. Perhaps his little sister would know more about them, since she worked in the city. He would have to ask her about those some time in the future.

Oh yes, since he was here, he might as well check the town notice board and see if there were any important announcements. A few turns here, a walk down a long stretch of road there, and soon he was near the town square.

"Let's see," Ivan muttered to himself as he scanned the huge notice board, "is there anything new?" Announcements of several weddings, a birth, a few obituaries; no one he knew. A knife-throwing contest; Natalia would probably be interested in that. Advertisements of services, for lost belongings and... what's this?

Ivan stared at the sheet of A4 paper pinned to the board. It was a simple missing persons poster; he had seen a few such posters before. And just like those, this one had a brief description of the missing individual, a contact number and address, as well as a notice of a reward for any information.

The poster also had a picture of the missing individual on it - a rabbit. Not just a picture of any rabbit either. There was no mistaking it; those adorable white fuzzy ears, those pretty eyes - it was a picture of his guest.

A picture of Gilbert.

It was not even a nice one, Ivan thought, staring at the smirk on the rabbit's face. Gilbert looked much better when he was smiling, or when he was asleep.

"That wasn't here a few days ago," the bear said aloud.

"The missing persons one? No, that just went up on the board today," the person next to him explained. "Two strangers put it there and a few more of those posters in some other places in town. They came early this morning and were asking around about that rabbit. I told them no, no one here had seen him. We're such a small place that if anyone new shows up, it'd be the talk of the town. They were disappointed, but I told them it was all right to tack on those posters in town, just in case their missing friend turns up."

"Oh. Were they rabbits too?"

"No, dogs. Real strange, since the big, tall one said that the missing rabbit there is his brother. Are you going to look for the rabbit then? The reward is quite a lot of money."

"Maybe I will!" Ivan said, nodding.

"Good luck then. See you."

Ivan waited until he was alone before he ripped the poster off the notice board. He was about to tear it into pieces, but then paused, staring at the picture of Gilbert. The bear sighed, then folded the sheet of paper into a small square before neatly tucking it into his wallet.

-x-

"You went shopping again? Hey, a diary! For me? Cool."

"You like it?" Ivan asked, then decided that it was such a silly question to ask. Of course Gilbert liked it. The bunny had the most excited look on his face as he hobbled to the couch with his new diary and pens.

"Why were you so late anyway? Did you go visit your sister?" Gilbert asked as he looked at the pens Ivan bought for him.

"I had an errand to take care of after work, that's all."

"Errand?" Gilbert decided on the pen with the surfing rabbits, it seemed. He grinned and uncapped the pen.

"It was nothing important. I did not realise it would take so long, that's all. What do you want to eat for dinner, Gilbert?"

"Anything's fine. Just call me when you're done. I'll be busy with my new diary," Gilbert replied, not looking up from his writing.

Well, walking around town tearing down all those missing posters of Gilbert did take longer than he expected, but he was not going to tell the bunny that. He was not going to let anyone take Gilbert away from him. Not when Gilbert looked so happy on the couch, lying down on his stomach as he wrote in his new diary.

The cute bunny was happy here, Ivan told himself. And as long as Gilbert was happy, _he_ was happy too.

That was what mattered, yes?

He smiled and then went into the kitchen, humming softly to himself.

-x-

Ivan wound his scarf a little tighter around his neck as he walked down the path to his sister's farm. His sister had made that scarf for him years ago and even though it was a little threadbare in a few spots, he was still fond of wearing it. His sister had offered to make him a new one, but he had declined, saying that it was still in good condition.

He knocked on the door and a few moments later, his sister opened it. She immediately trembled a little and said, "Oh, Vanya! I didn't expect to see you today. Is it about the gas bill again? I'll pay you once I get the money from the livestock sale–"

"No, it's not about the gas bill," he interrupted quickly, "I just wanted to come visit for a little while."

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, come in then. I will make you something warm to drink. It's already getting colder, yes?"

He nodded in agreement. It would not be long before it was _that_ time of the year. How quickly time passed, yes?

His sister handed him his drink, then eyed him critically. "Have you been eating well? You seem a bit... thin."

Ivan laughed. "I have been eating properly, like always! Do not worry about me!"

"Are you sure? You know you need to bulk up quite a bit, since it's almost time for – you know."

Ivan squirmed a little in his seat. "I have been a little busy."

"Busy? With what?"

Ivan's cheeks turned slightly red. While his appetite was still hearty and he _had _made some attempts to bulk up his figure, Gilbert's appetite not only matched his own, but actually put it to shame – and Ivan was not just talking in terms of food. Normally he would have put on quite a bit of weight by now in preparation, but Gilbert's untiring demands had an effect on his attempts to store up some energy reserves.

He coughed a little before he answered, "Helping with Gilbert's recovery." Well, it was not exactly a lie.

"Ah, is his leg all right now? I am sure he's glad to get that cast off after hobbling about in it for eight weeks."

"Oh, he is _very_ happy indeed."

Happy was putting it lightly. Gilbert's demands had increased once he had the cast off his leg a week ago; before he was just needy in the mornings, but now he was needy in the mornings, evenings and various other slots in between. Perhaps it was far easier to just refuse, but it was impossible to say no to the bunny; Gilbert was just so adorable when he was frustrated and besides, Ivan_ really_ enjoyed giving in to his demands anyway.

"That's good. Soon he will be well enough to go home. Hopefully before it gets too cold to travel."

Ivan froze. Home? The bunny did not have to leave. He was already home, Ivan silently insisted. Gilbert should stay with _him._ "But I thought he'd be staying with me! I make sure that he's eating well!" he protested.

His sister seemed to have misunderstood, for she chuckled and said, "Don't be silly! Hares or bunnies do not need to get ready for the cold, Vanya."

"They don't?"

"No, they are like your sisters, yes? We don't need to bulk up like you do."

"Oh. I see."

-x-

"I'm home!" Ivan announced when he opened the door, but with slightly less enthusiasm than usual.

"Hey," Gilbert greeted, swathed in a fleece blanket on the couch, "you're late again."

"I went to visit my sister. She sends her regards," Ivan replied, ruffling Gilbert's hair, then his fuzzy ears affectionately before kissing him on the cheek. "Are you cold?"

"A bit. Can't you turn the heat up or something?"

"I will see what I can do, yes? So what have you been up to today?"

"Just the usual. Some reading. Writing in my awesome diary. Oh, I'm going to run out of pages soon. Get me another."

"Sure, tomorrow. Hungry? I mean, for _food._ All right, I will cook us something."

-x-

Gilbert tugged his blanket closer around his shoulders and tried to get back to his reading. After he had complained about how there was nothing to do in the house while Ivan was away at work, the bear not only got him a diary to write in, Ivan also made several trips to the town library every now and then to borrow several books in a language Gilbert could understand.

He had settled into a nice routine while living in Ivan's home; in the morning it would be some awesome sex before Ivan went to work, then a quick nap. After that he would get up, shower and dress himself before he ate a late breakfast and then did some reading, or some light chores around the house. Ivan's sister had insisted he try to do some 'light physical activity' – something he did not really understand, since he figured he was already physically active – but there was absolutely no way he could say no to the girl, since she had such a big – err, heart.

Speaking of chores, strangely enough, like his father, Ivan also insisted that Gilbert did not do anything that required a fair bit of bending over. Once he was done with the chores – a bit of dusting, watering the indoor plants and some other boring crap – he would eat, then curl up on the couch with a book, or maybe write in his diary until Ivan got home. If Ivan had borrowed a good book, he would be content for some romping in bed later; if the book sucked, well, he would demand Ivan remedy his restlessness and boredom the moment the bear stepped in the house, instead of bothering with dinner first.

And speaking of dinner, why was Ivan taking so long? Gilbert reluctantly got up from his comfortable seat and carefully made his way to the kitchen. Even though he had the cast off, he was told not to put too much weight on his newly-healed foot just yet. "Hey, Ivan," he grumbled when he reached the kitchen, "whatever you're cooking had better be ready–"

He blinked when he saw Ivan slumped at the kitchen table. The bear seemed to be asleep; his head was pillowed on his arms, which were resting on the table. "Great," Gilbert mumbled. "Wake up, sleepyhead," he muttered, shaking Ivan by the shoulder, "I'm hungry."

The bear remained still.

"Ivan?" Gilbert shook the bear harder, but he still failed to get a response. Annoyed, but also starting to feel worried, he yanked hard on one of Ivan's ears. Usually that got Ivan's attention, but not this time; the bear did not move.

Was the bear sick? Gilbert was starting to panic. He needed to get help, but from whom? And where? He had never gone out of the house; Ivan did not let him and after that horrible cold gust of air that blew in his face when he _did_ try that one time, he was not quite keen on the idea since. While Ivan had mentioned several times that his elder sister's farm was nearby, Gilbert had no idea where exactly that was.

Gilbert's eyes narrowed. Oh, screw it! He dashed to get Ivan's coat – thank god the keys were in one of the pockets – then bundled himself up in it as best as he could in the oversized clothing, before he ran out of the house.

He was determined to find help somehow, he told himself, ignoring the fact that he was already starting to shiver because _holy crap it was freezing_. After all, he was an awesome bunny, wasn't he?

-x-

"Vanya? Vanya, wake up."

Ivan slowly drifted into consciousness when he heard that voice call his name, but there was a strong urge in him that wanted otherwise.

"Vanya, wake up," said the voice, more loudly this time.

The bear heard himself sigh before he reluctantly opened his eyes to find his sister standing next to him. "Hmm? What are you doing here?" he mumbled sleepily before he was overtaken by a rather monstrous yawn.

His sister ignored him. Instead, she looked away and said, "See? He's all right. He was just really sleepy, that's all. It sometimes happens to bears like him, especially around this time."

Who was she talking to? Ivan rubbed his eyes and tried to focus. He blinked a few times when he realised that Gilbert was huddled on one of the kitchen chairs, shivering a little in the bear's coat and a blanket around his shoulders. The bunny also had a towel around his head and ears, while his complexion seemed even paler than usual.

"Vanya, you mean thing," his sister scolded, "you made poor Gilbert here worry! Why didn't you explain to him that you're going to hibernate soon? You know that you have those deep naps when it's almost time to go into hibernation. He was scared ("I wasn't scared!" Gilbert protested rather indignantly) and thought you were sick, so he ran to get you some help. And you know what our weather is like, it's too cold for him! He was outside for over an hour before the poor freezing thing finally found the way to the farm."

Wait, Gilbert was that worried for him? The bunny even went outside in that awful weather to get help? He never thought that Gilbert would do such a thing; he had always assumed that Gilbert would rather leave the bear and go home if the bunny had the chance. But no. Gilbert went out and actually came back. The bunny really cared for him after all!

Ivan sniffed and felt tears of joy forming in his eyes.

"I'm sorry!" he blurted and tackled the startled Gilbert off his chair and onto the floor. "I did not know I made you worry so much!"

"Get off me!" Gilbert yelled in irritation, but Ivan ignored the bunny and instead hugged him even closer, all the while apologising profusely, while his sister laughed in amusement.

"You two are so funny!"

"I'm not funny, I'm super-cute and – will you just _let go_ already you stupid bear?"

-x-

Ivan bid his sister goodbye and thanked her before she left. Gilbert was already asleep in bed, bundled up in an extra layer of blankets; his sister had insisted on it, since she did not want the bunny to get a cold. Even though Gilbert had denied it, the siblings knew that his outdoor exertions had tired him and both of them had bullied him into going to bed early. Ivan had been very amused when Gilbert fell asleep the moment his head touched the pillow.

He began thinking while he got ready for bed himself. What was he going to do about Gilbert? It was not far off before he had to go into hibernation.

Maybe Gilbert should stay with his elder sister? Wisent do not need to hibernate, after all. No, maybe not; she was too sensitive about things and Gilbert would probably – no, make that _definitely_ – end up making her cry over something, and then their little sister would kill him. He could not make Gilbert stay with their little sister either, since Natalia would definitely find him annoying then kill him straight away, and _then_ their elder sister would end up crying.

No, that would not work. Definitely not. He needed to find another alternative, yes?

Perhaps Gilbert could just stay in the house during winter while Ivan was in hibernation? He could stock up on food supplies and leave Gilbert to take care of himself. The bunny was not an expert chef but he could cook a little; Gilbert occasionally made something to eat if the food Ivan left for him in the mornings was not enough. Yes, that could work–

No, wait – there was the time Gilbert had accidentally started a small fire in the kitchen. Fortunately Ivan had just reached home then and was able to yank the startled bunny out of harm's way and put the fire out. No, making Gilbert fend for himself was not a good option. Even if Gilbert took extra pains to be careful when he cooked, Ivan did not like the idea of leaving Gilbert alone to take care of things. His sister had made it clear that bunnies could not handle being lonely very well since they needed lots of social contact, or failing that, lots of amusement – and he was _not _going to share Gilbert with anyone regarding that amusement bit.

Ivan gasped when something else occurred to him. How would Gilbert be able to fulfill his – _ahem_ – very consistent demands during winter? The bear suddenly had a mental image of a very annoyed Gilbert clambering on top of his deeply sleeping form, all the while growling and insisting that he wake up. While Gilbert may be able to – he blushed – somehow persuade his sleeping self to cater to the bunny's physical needs, the strenuous physical efforts on _his _part would dig into his energy reserves and that could mean – _eek!_

Ivan shook his head and shuddered, trying to get the awful mental image of being reduced to nothing more than skin and bones out of his head. Oh no, he rather liked being a nicely-built bear, thank you very much.

He sighed and eyed the dozing bunny on the bed for a long time before he bent down and kissed Gilbert on the forehead. Shaking his head slightly, he smiled when Gilbert mumbled something in his sleep. Ivan then got up and went to the coat rack. He reached for his wallet in his coat pocket and then took out the folded piece of paper he kept there. Sighing again, he unfolded the paper and stared at the address printed on it.

There was no other way, he decided reluctantly. As much as the idea hurt him, he had to take Gilbert home.


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 10**

"So how long will this hibernation crap take?" Gilbert asked the next day during breakfast. Ivan had cancelled all his morning appointments so that he could discuss things with the bunny, who was not too pleased about not being able to stay in bed as usual.

"About three months or so!"

Gilbert exhaled rather noisily. "So what the hell am I gonna do in this house for three months while you're busy being Sleeping Beauty?" he grumbled, his lower lip sticking out slightly in a stubborn pout.

Ivan blinked. He was not sure which made him happier; that Gilbert had assumed that he was going to stay with Ivan during the bear's hibernation, or the matter-of-fact way he said it.

"–because there's only so much to do here and unless you install something _really_ cool in the house like – like an arcade game, I'm gonna _make_ you wake up – _aargh! _Get off me!"

Ivan, who had tackled Gilbert off his chair in a crushing hug, was smiling so much his cheeks were starting to hurt. "Gilbert! I'm so happy!" he declared.

All this time he was heavily reluctant to let Gilbert even step out of the house and fulfilled almost every one of Gilbert's whims, afraid that the adorable bunny would just leave and forget about him. Sure, Gilbert had gone out to get help for him last night, but Ivan was almost certain that the bunny had returned to the house only because Ivan's elder sister made him. Apparently Ivan was wrong. Gilbert did not mind staying with him – no, Gilbert _wanted_ to stay with him.

"Whatever! Just get _off!"_ Gilbert snarled.

Ivan obediently sat up, at the same time gently pulling Gilbert into his lap. He stroked Gilbert's hair and ears, knowing that the gesture would calm the fuming bunny. "You won't be bored for the next three months," he said.

"Really? So you _are _getting me an arcade game?" Gilbert said, his eyes widening while his tail twitched slightly in excitement.

"No, perhaps even better," Ivan said, ignoring Gilbert's disappointed pout. "I'll take you home tomorrow. Your leg is fine now, and we should get you home before it is too cold for you to travel."

"Home?" Gilbert blinked, then grinned. "Yeah, it'd be neat to see West again! I bet he missed the awesome me so much, he's been moping around like a stupid sad puppy." He frowned. "But what about you?"

Ivan stiffened in surprise. "Me?"

"Well, yeah." Gilbert's eyes narrowed. "You're not thinking of just running off after dropping me home, are you? Because if you are, I'll hunt you down and–"

"No, no!" Ivan interrupted, growing giddier with joy by the moment, "I-I _promise_ that I will come to your house frequently once I am done with my hibernation, yes? We will be – oh, what is the word they use – ah, pruning!"

Gilbert stared at him. "Pru... oh, you mean _dating."_

"Prune, date," Ivan said, shrugging, "same thing, yes?"

Gilbert kept silent for a few moments as he mulled it over. The feeling of joy that had been building up in Ivan plateaued, then wondered if it should resume ascending, or perhaps it was more appropriate to go to the pub and get piss-drunk instead.

Ivan frowned. What if Gilbert was not keen on the pru– err, dating idea? "Gilbert?" he prompted, after a long and uneasy silence.

"Three months, huh?"

"Yes."

"And I'm going home tomorrow?"

"Yes?"

"I'd better get started then."

Now it was Ivan's turn to stare at the bunny in his lap. "Pardon?" he asked, confused.

Gilbert grinned in mischief and his eyes took on a rather predatory look.

Ivan suddenly felt, very, very afraid. He gulped.

"Think I can get three months' worth of... _entertainment_ done in one day?"

For the first time in his life, Ivan actually _squeaked._

-x-

The journey to Gilbert's home the next day was delayed for roughly two hours due to several reasons. The first was the fact that both bear and bunny got up much later than usual in the morning, understandably due to – _ahem_ – intense physical exertion.

The second was that Ivan had fussed over Gilbert's outerwear far longer than expected, as the bear feared that the bunny was not wearing enough to keep warm, even though he was clad in Ivan's warmest coat and scarf, making a rather comical sight since the coat was two sizes bigger. This issue however, was promptly solved by Gilbert trodding on Ivan's foot before grumpily storming out of the house, leaving the bear to hop about on one leg for a bit as he trailed after the bunny.

The third was the fuss Gilbert made about having to walk all the way home through the intellectually-deficient woods in his oversized attire, but this too was promptly solved, albeit with a rather significant blow to the bunny's gigantic ego.

"–and walking that trail is not going to be cool with this coat on! I know it's fucking cold, but just lemme rip a small hole in the back, I can't stand having my tail cooped up like this–"

"No!" Ivan quickly protested. Having that white fluffy tail out in the open was _not _a good idea. He had problems resisting the urge to touch and play with that soft tail – not to mention the following results – and he sure did not need random passersby to be tempted with Gilbert's tail either. "It's too cold for it, yes?" he said, trying to find a plausible excuse. "I don't want your cute tail to freeze and then just drop off!"

Gilbert's ears shot up in surprise and his face turned pale. "Drop... off?"

"Yes!"

The bunny shuddered. "But it's so fucking uncomfortable!" he grumbled.

"Don't worry, it's just for a little while, yes?"

"What do you mean a little while, it's going to take hours walking back home–"

"Don't be silly," Ivan chided, but not unkindly, "who said anything about walking all the way there? We're going to take the bus."

Gilbert came to a dead halt. "The bus," he repeated, staring at Ivan.

"Yes, we will take the bus. Is something wrong?"

"You mean I spent hours walking in those stupid woods just to get here all those weeks ago, when I could've just taken a _bus?"_

Ivan blinked. "Yes?"

"Fuck."

Ivan knew that Gilbert was very forward and had some strong urges, but this? Wasn't yesterday _enough? _The bear turned bright red and gasped, "Now? Out here in the open?"

"What are you – oh hell_ no!"_

-x-

Ludwig checked his e-mail for the fifth time that day, hoping that someone would contact him with news of his missing brother. Arthur's scrying all those weeks ago had given him a general idea of Gilbert's current whereabouts, so he and Feliciano had gone to the towns in the area to ask around and to put up posters of the bunny. Feliciano had also suggested offering some form of reward as an incentive for people to come forward with information, an idea Ludwig agreed to albeit with a slight change; instead of pasta, Ludwig would offer a cash reward.

Weeks passed but no one had contacted Ludwig with anything; all the calls or emails he received were from drunks or pranksters who wanted to give him their contact numbers, "so that cute bunny on the poster can call me when he gets home!" Needless to say, they were ignored.

Arthur had tried to assure him that Gilbert was safe and sound, but Ludwig remained convinced that his brother was being held by traffickers or other heinous elements, who were forcing poor Gilbert into doing something such as kinky or bondage porn – well what _else_ would it be, with those cute ears and fluffy tail? – or anything along those lines.

Ludwig had requested his favourite DVD store to notify him of new adult releases starring cute bunnies for this specific reason. While none of those new DVDs had Gilbert in them (and Ludwig had viewed them all very thoroughly, just in case whomever holding Gilbert had tried to disguise his brother's appearance) the _Schäferhund _was quite certain that it was only a matter of time before one turned up.

He sighed in disappointment when he found his inbox empty. Oh well, perhaps he would have better luck in the evening – or even tomorrow. He would not give up hope on finding Gilbert. Maybe another trip to Arthur's was necessary? Perhaps he could offer the lop-eared bunny some assistance in buying a better scrying pot – the deluxe model Arthur had once mentioned – so they would have improved chances in pinpointing Gilbert's location.

A quick glance at the clock on the wall told him it was four-thirty. That, and the growl his stomach made, reminded him that he had not eaten since breakfast. He was just about to head off into the kitchen to make something to eat when the doorbell rang, followed by a quick succession of pounding on the front door.

Ludwig bolted. Only one person dared to do that and he hoped that particular individual was in fact, standing right on the other side of the door. He flung it open, nearly wrenching it off its hinges.

"Hey West!" Gilbert greeted with a grin on his face, as if he had never left home and instead had just gone to and returned from a quick trip to the shops. "Did you miss _meeeeeggh!"_

Ludwig brought his brother down to the ground with a spirited leap and nearly crushed the bunny in a hug. "Gilbert!" he cried out. He could also feel tears of joy and relief in his eyes, but he did not care if his brother was going to grumble about how unmanly he was acting – Gilbert was finally home. "Are you all right? Where have you been?" he asked as he stood and pulled a somewhat dazed Gilbert up along with him. He was going to ask more questions when he finally noticed the tall figure standing nearby.

Acting on instinct, Ludwig shoved Gilbert behind him, shielding his brother from the stranger. "Who are you?" Ludwig growled. His tail stiffened, while his eyes narrowed as he assessed the threat, which practically screamed 'predator', with that scent. He was about to tell Gilbert to run to safety so he could start ripping a hole in the stranger's neck when his brother tugged sharply on his arm.

"West, it's okay!" Gilbert said. "He's with me!"

With Gilbert? This – this _bear? _

"He brought me here, okay?" Gilbert added when Ludwig did not relax from his defensive posture.

Ludwig blurted in disbelief, "He did?"

The bear nodded and smiled. "Hello," he greeted, "I'm Ivan. You must be Gilbert's younger brother, yes? Gilbert told me about you."

"Yeah West, so stop being such an idiot and calm down."

Ludwig's mouth opened and closed silently a few times before he said, "Sorry about that. I thought you were – oh, never mind." He took a deep breath to compose himself. "Thank you so much for bringing my brother home," he said formally, but at the same time he felt as though he had missed something. Something rather important.

"You're welcome!"

Ludwig frowned, then took a long look at Ivan before he decided he knew what was bothering him. "Pardon me for saying this," Ludwig said, making the appropriate gestures with his hands, "but aren't you a little, err, _thin_ for a bear?"

Ivan's cheeks flushed. "Your brother has a very healthy appetite."

"Oh, him? Yes, he can eat quite a lot – I take it he's been a considerable drain on your food supply? I'd be happy to reimburse you."

The bear turned completely scarlet, but his lips turned up in a rather odd smile. "Well, I was not just referring to food!" he exclaimed.

"Oh." Ludwig blinked once, then twice. _"Oh."_ His own face quickly matched the shade on Ivan's; at first from embarrassment, then from fury. "What the hell did you do to my brother?" he bellowed as he shoved Gilbert behind him again.

Ivan tapped his forefinger against his chin in thought. "Well, there was that time in the shower, and then on the couch–" he began, counting off his fingers, but he never made it past item number two on his list, for Ludwig howled in rage and lunged at him.

-x-

Feliciano rubbed his eyes sleepily as he trotted off to the living room. He was taking a quick nap when loud shouts from outside the house had awakened him. "Ve, Ludwig," he called out, "what's going... on?"

He blinked at the scene that greeted him when he stepped outside.

Ludwig and another person – a bear, Feliciano thought, judging from the person's scent and distinctive ears – were engaged in a melee, making the most awful racket as the two rolled on the ground, growling and snarling at each other. Ludwig was currently trying to strangle the bear, who in turn was attempting to rip off the _Schäferhund's _ears_._

What caught Feliciano's full attention however, was someone else.

"Gilbert!" Feliciano cried out, but apparently the bunny had not heard him, for Gilbert was trying to break up the ongoing scrap. The bunny was shouting at the two combatants and had aimed a few kicks at them, not caring who was on the receiving end. However, both Ludwig and the strange bear were far too preoccupied with fighting each other to notice Gilbert's efforts. The amount of violence however, was more than enough to make the Italian greyhound tremble.

While Gilbert was occupied with yelling and swearing at the brawling duo – strangely enough, Feliciano thought that he seemed to be more entertained rather than annoyed with them – the little Italian greyhound stood behind him, staring at his tail. The white puft poking out of Gilbert's trousers twitched ever so slightly in time with his shouts, and in due course, Feliciano's own twitching fingers matched its rhythm.

Gilbert's tail looked awfully soft and inviting... surely it wouldn't hurt just touch it a little bit? Maybe not a squeeze, since Ludwig had explained to him just why it was not a good idea, but just a _tiny_ pinch?

Besides, curiosity may have killed the cat, but it did not say anything about dogs.

The bunny was busy shouting at his brother and that bear anyway, he would not even feel a thing, Feliciano decided. His hand moving as if on its own volition, it reached out to the puffy ball of white fur, thumb and forefinger grasping a midgeon of the soft-looking tail before giving it just a midget of a squeeze.

The loud, breathy, _sexy_ moan that came from Gilbert's mouth was something that the suddenly furiously-blushing Feliciano would never forget for the rest of his life.

The ongoing melee between Ludwig and the bear immediately ceased. "Hands off his tail!" they yelled.

Feliciano started to back away when both of them _and _Gilbert glared at him. "Umm... ve?" he mumbled, trying to look as harmless and cute as possible, recalling and trying to imitate Gilbert's expression at Ludwig whenever he really wanted something.

"Not good enough," Ludwig said.

"Not cute enough," the bear decided.

Feliciano then decided that being overly curious was okay for cats, since cats possessed nine lives. Dogs on the other hand, were a different story.

He yelped and ran to save the one life he's got.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'. Just one more to go~

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 11**

The coffee table was the only object that separated the two parties to the conflict.

Ludwig and Feliciano sat on the couch, the _Schäferhund _sporting a bruised eye and a hastily-bandaged ear, while seated opposite them were Gilbert and Ivan, with the bear unsuccessfully trying to hide the bruises on his neck with his scarf.

After rounding up all parties involved earlier with a great deal of threatening, pleading, kicking and biting plus one promise of pasta for dinner, it was decided that they would all be Mature Adults about this and thus would discuss things in a Proper Manner.

Proper Manner in this case however, involved Ludwig and Ivan glaring not only daggers, but also cluster bombs and intercontinental ballistic missiles at each other, while Gilbert and Feliciano remained quite blissfully ignorant of the tension in the living room and instead busied themselves with some of the Italian greyhound's delicious gelato.

After five minutes' worth of nothing but glaring and soft growling, Ludwig took a deep breath and then said, "Perhaps we should start over. Thanks for taking care of and bringing my brother home, Ivan."

"You're welcome, Ludwig." A nod.

"I'd be happy to pay you the promised reward as well as fork out any costs incurred during my brother's... stay with you." A nod, with a wee bit of glaring.

"It is all right about the reward and those extra costs, yes? I really, _really_ enjoyed Gilbert's company since we had _lots_ of fun together. Repeatedly." A smile, with a little laugh that could be considered as amused, as well as maniacal.

"I'm sure you did." An intense stare, pupils dilated, plus a very stiff tail. Oh, not to mention a very, very firm grip on the couch's armrest.

"He has quite an appetite, yes? Oh, for food as well. I did not realise that some bunnies ate like carnivores. Although I noticed he does snack on carrots quite often!"

"My brother does _not_ like carrots." The fabric on the armrest ripped apart with a ghastly noise.

"Really?" A smile with a heavy dose of smugness in it, and a quick glance to the side.

A stare of disbelief._ "Gilbert!"_

Gilbert blinked. "What?" he asked, absently dipping a carrot stick in his bowl of gelato. "I just felt like eating it, okay?" he added when his brother kept staring at him.

Ludwig exhaled rather noisily in irritation. "Fine, let's finish this. Again, thank you for all what you've done, but I must ask you to leave now."

"Oh, of course!" Ivan replied, smiling. "I need to catch the last bus back home anyway, yes? I will miss my little bunny, but I will come visit–"

"Visit?" Ludwig interrupted. "What do you mean, _visit?"_

Ivan shrugged. "After I am done hibernating, yes? I will come visit Gilbert often. We have decided that we will gone on prunes – sorry, dates after that."

"What do you mean, you're going out with my brother?" Ludwig said, standing up.

"I will come and take him to see movie, or go to restaurants–"

"That's not what I meant!" Ludwig snarled, glaring at the bear.

Ivan stood up and glared back. "Perhaps we should just ask Gilbert what _he_ wants, yes?"

"Yes, why don't we? Gilbert – eh? _Gilbert?"_ Both bear and dog looked around, but said bunny was nowhere in sight. "Where did he go?" Ludwig said.

"Oh, he said he got tired of listening to two idiots yelling and went to his room," Feliciano answered brightly. "Ve, who did he mean? He can't mean us, since I'm sure he mentioned two people and there's three of us here... and since it isn't switched on, so I guess he wasn't talking about something on the TV?"

"Never mind."

-x-

Feliciano was very happy that Gilbert had returned home, although he was not quite sure why Ludwig seemed to be hostile towards the bear that accompanied the bunny. He thought that Ivan was a rather nice bear (with such nice fuzzy ears too, ve~), although the fight between Ludwig and Ivan earlier had frightened the little Italian greyhound.

Ludwig had gone to retrieve his brother from his room and had yet to return. Apparently Gilbert was either sleeping or playing video games and was not in the mood to come back to the living room to continue the discussion, for there was a fair bit of Stop That This Instants and Screw Yous heard from the direction of Gilbert's room.

"They are quite noisy, yes?" Ivan said.

"Ve, it's always like this! I think it's just something that brothers do a lot, since Lovi – that's my older brother – he yells at me quite often too!"

"Really?"

"Yes! Ludwig does it because he's worried about Gilbert a lot. See, their Papa told him to take good care of Gilbert, so Ludwig takes it very seriously! Especially when lots of people think that cute bunnies like Gilbert are irrespon... no, that's not it, but Ludwig says it's true anyway – uh, irres..."

"Irresistible?" Ivan suggested.

Feliciano nodded. "Ludwig explained it to me once. He said that it has something to do with pheno... paedo... no, that's what Francis calls Antonio sometimes, phero... oh, scent stuff."

"Really?"

The little greyhound nodded. "He says sometimes bunnies can smell so nice that it makes other people horny!" he said matter-of-factly. "Does Gilbert smell nice then?"

Ivan nodded, but at the same time he turned a rather fascinating shade of pink.

"Ve! He also said that was how their Papa ended up with Gilbert's Mama! See, their Papa drank too many beers one night and grabbed the tail of this really hot hare he thought looked cute but lonely and they ended up being holed up in her burrow for a month and she wouldn't let him leave," Feliciano said, then gasped for a breath before he continued, "and I think his Papa had to be dragged out of there once his friends found him because he was too tired to move and then Gilbert's Mama threw a fit and tried to kill him for ditching her like that and he had to keep moving around for a while!"

Ivan smiled, but he also paled just a little bit. "And then?"

"Then she had Gilbert and made him take care of his new son. She did beat him up quite a bit first though!"

"I see." There was a rather long silence, which other people would have found uneasy, but not Feliciano. He simply used the quiet moment to catch his breath, all the time smiling at Ivan. The bear changed the subject. "Gilbert's tail is very nice, yes?"

Feliciano nodded and waved his arms in enthusiasm. "Ve! It's so soft and fluffy and cute!" he replied, beaming.

Ivan nodded and beamed as well, but for some reason the smile bothered Feliciano, who gulped and started shivering. "You will _not _touch it again, yes?" the bear said.

The little greyhound made a little whimper and nodded. "Ve... got it."

-x-

"So, about this dating thing," Ludwig said once they were all calmly seated. The seating arrangements this time however, were different; Ludwig had insisted that Gilbert sit next to him, for he was not too comfortable having his brother seated next to Ivan. He looked at Gilbert, who was giving him one hell of a glare, which he ignored. "Does he _have_ to come here? Can't you have one of those long-distance relationships and just talk on the phone or something?"

Gilbert gave him a frustrated look. "I'm a bunny, remember? I have _needs."_

Ludwig not only remembered, he also recalled all their father's stories about Gilbert's mother. Oh well. Their father had warned him that even with their strict canine upbringing, Gilbert's rabbit instincts and traits would fully surface one day. He just never expected that it would be like _this._

Ivan cleared his throat to get Ludwig's attention. "So can I come visit after winter?"

"You are _not_ getting anywhere near my brother–"

Gilbert rather viciously stomped on Ludwig's foot and glared at him.

"–unless you call first to let me know you're coming," Ludwig continued, resisting the urge to scream a little and hop about on his uninjured foot. Gilbert may be smaller and lighter, but _damn_ could he stomp. He almost regretted insisting that Gilbert sit next to him.

"And take him out on weekends?" Ivan asked hopefully.

Ludwig nodded. Gilbert's boot came to a halt just an inch away from his right foot.

"That's wonderful, ve!" Felicano exclaimed happily.

Ludwig sighed and looked at his brother. Gilbert's expression clearly indicated whomever he chose to see was nobody's business but his own, and any attempt to change that would result in any of the following: a shouting match; a migraine (on Ludwig's part, of course); a painful brawl (Ludwig was certain he would be triumphant, but not without suffering at least a split lip); a lengthy period of sulking (by Gilbert, obviously); or even all four – in that order. He would just have to accept this whole my-brother-is-dating-a-suspicious-bear thing.

But _still._

Why a plumber? Couldn't Gilbert have picked someone with a promising career or more stable prospects? Like a doctor. Or at least, a civil servant.

He must have said that out loud, for Ivan glared at him. The bear said in an accusing tone, "Do you have something against the working class?"

"Well, no, it's just that I'm sure anyone would want his brother to go out with someone with financial stability–"

"Capitalist pig!"

"Communist scum!"

"Ve, ve!" Feliciano said hurriedly, hoping to forestall any more fighting, since Ludwig and Ivan looked as if they were about to go for each other's throats again while Gilbert looked ready to kick _both_ of them out of the house. "I have a suggestion!"

"What?" Gilbert asked.

"Since you don't want Ivan to come here – maybe it's too much of a trouble for him ("No, no trouble at all, yes?"), so why not let Gilbert go to Ivan's? It would be fun!"

Both dog and bear stared at each other before they turned to Feliciano. "Absolutely _not!"_ they bellowed in unison, causing Feliciano to squeak and hide under the coffee table. "You can't let him go out alone!"

"Why the hell not?" Gilbert protested. "It does sound kind of cool."

Ivan and Ludwig knew that they were thinking of the same thing – namely a certain fluffy white tail and the effects of touching it – and thus were not surprised when they shouted the same reason.

_"Because!"_

Gilbert rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine," he grumbled, giving in. "At least that's one thing those two idiots agree on," he muttered softly, but said two idiots had rather sharp hearing.

They eyed each other and nodded reluctantly, silently agreeing to a truce.

"But three months is quite a long time," Ivan said in a worried tone, "will Gilbert be – err, you know, fine on his own? He does have an appetite, yes?"

Ludwig coughed, his cheeks slightly pink. "I think it should be all right. If he has his video games to – uh, distract him, he'll be just fine. Right, Gilbert? _Gilbert?"_

"Gilbert went to his room again. He kept saying he was tired of having to listen to two idiots. Ve, Ludwig, Ivan – who are those two idiots he keeps talking about anyway? Oh, and he said he wanted to start on _Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom Part VIII, _since he never got around to playing it before he left," Feliciano helpfully explained from under the table.

Ludwig shrugged. "See? Give him _Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom Part IX_ next and he'll be happy being stuck indoors for the next few weeks."

"I see. Well, I should get going, yes?" Ivan said.

"Already? Why don't you stay for dinner?" Feliciano invited as he crawled out from his shelter, confident that things were now fine.

"He would miss his bus," Ludwig growled, but his friend did not hear him.

"And I'm sure you would like to say bye-bye to Gilbert first, ve? And he would surely want to do the same!"

Ivan smiled. "Yes, you are right. I think I will stay for dinner. What are we having?"

Feliciano beamed. "Pasta!"


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 12**

"West," his brother whined during breakfast, "I'm booooooored."

Ludwig let out a long sigh. Did Gilbert have to look at him like that? With those sad doe-like eyes and floppy ears? He drew in a deep breath before he answered, "Didn't you just get a new video game last week?"

Gilbert's lower lip jutted out ever so slightly. "I finished that two days ago," he grumbled and then slouched in his chair as he let out a long sigh of his own. "I'm boooooooooooooored," he repeated.

Ludwig made a non-commital grunt and instead of replying to his brother's statement, decided to tend to the dirty dishes in the kitchen sink.

It had been six weeks since Gilbert returned home with That Bear (Ludwig refused to refer to that – that _kidnapper, _for he hid Gilbert away all those weeks, injury or no injury, by his name) and already Ludwig was starting to feel rather strained. He almost wished that their father was here, so the older _Schäferhund _could take charge of things.

His father would undoubtedly do a better job at handling the current situation. _He_ was at a loss on how to handle Gilbert's current moods; usually his bunny brother was quite easy to deal with, but after Gilbert's long stay with That Bear some of his rabbit instincts had finally surfaced – with a vengeance! – after having lain dormant all these years.

The munching on carrot sticks thing? A little odd, but it was not a major issue; Ludwig simply had to make sure he had a constant supply of carrots and peanut butter in the house. (He had been amused when Gilbert told him that the bunny still hated the taste of carrots, hence the necessity of eating a carrot stick with a generous dollop of peanut butter.) The stomping around and kicking? Also easily solved by making sure Gilbert got whatever he wanted to ensure he was in a good mood, or failing that, by wearing shin guards and steel-toed boots.

The restlessness? The extra whining and grumbling? The staring off into distance and sighing? And the odd (and Not Sexy, Dammit!) moans he heard from Gilbert's room at night? Those, he had no idea how to deal with.

For the second time that morning, Ludwig wished for their's father's presence. Maybe his father would just drag Gilbert on his lap and deliver a long-overdue dose of – of spanking!

Ludwig stiffened. _Spanking?_ No, he did not just think of – _gaaaaaah!_

"Not that I don't find it entertaining, West," Gilbert said, obviously puzzled, "but why the hell are you hitting your head with that plate?"

"No reason!" Ludwig declared as he resumed rinsing the crockery.

Unfortunately for them, their father was not here and instead was on a ridiculous expedition somewhere. And unfortunately for him, there were not any guidebooks or manuals on dealing with bunnies with troublesome (not to mention devious, conniving, _perverted_ and _completely_ untrustworthy!) bears for boyfriends either.

Ludwig sighed.

Things were so much easier before Gilbert ran off those months ago. Back then, if he wanted his brother to quit causing a scene all he had to do was to tug on those bunny ears of Gilbert's so the bunny would go limp, but that option was no longer available to him now.

Another effect of Gilbert's little 'awesome adventure' as the bunny liked to describe it was that those fuzzy ears of his have somehow turned extra sensitive. The last time Ludwig yanked them was when Gilbert had wanted to force his way out the door so he could 'go take a long walk'. Yeah right, a long walk to the bus terminal and then zoom off to That Bear's, Ludwig had thought then, so when Gilbert had tried to pry the front door open he automatically reached for them – and then got the shock of his life when Gilbert practically _shrieked_ in pain. At first he thought Gilbert was just fibbing, since he had not actually yanked on those ears just yet, but had only a firm grasp on them, but his brother had genuine tears of pain in his eyes when Gilbert had yelled at him to knock it off.

And to think that before this, yanking Gilbert's ears only made the bunny look really helpless and seductive and – _aaaargh Ludwig stop that!_

"Okay West, that smacking your own head routine got boring just a while ago, so quit it."

Ludwig coughed and rinsed the cereal bowl before he left it on the dish drainer. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"You talking to that poor bowl, or me?"

"Very funny." Ludwig dried his hands on the dish towel. He turned around to find that Gilbert was still slouched in his chair with a rather sulky expression. That meant Ludwig had to find something to distract Gilbert with rather quickly, or else the bunny would start moping and whining, or worse, throw another feet-stomping tantrum. "Why don't we go out? I need to buy some things in town, so you can go and have those pancakes you like so much."

Gilbert sat up and brightened. "That'd be cool! It's been ages since I had them!" he said excitedly.

Ludwig smiled, partly in amusement, partly in relief. "Go shower and get changed, then. We'll leave in – oh, twenty minutes?"

"No problem!" said the bunny before he dashed off to his room in great enthusiasm.

Shaking his head slightly, Ludwig untied his apron and hung it on one of the hooks on the wall. Going to town would make Gilbert _very_ happy, but it would likely drive _him_ insane from trying to keep an eye on his brother.

He would need some backup this time, and while he was at it, perhaps some advice. Well, maybe not _some_ advice, but rather, _lots_ of it.

Ludwig made his way to the phone, thumbed through his brother's pawprint-patterned phone number and address book, located the relevant individual and called him up.

"Hello!"

"Hello, Antonio. This is Ludwig. I'm sorry to disturb you, but I need a favour..."

-x-

Feliciano knocked on the door. "Ve~ Ludwig, Gilbert? Hello, anyone home?" he called out. "I brought gelato," he added, hoping that would give either one of the brothers a bigger incentive to hurry up and open the door.

The Italian greyhound made it a point to visit frequently after Gilbert's return; he still felt partly responsible for Gilbert's disappearance and thus felt that he needed to make amends. Since Ludwig had been worried on how to keep Gilbert occupied until Ivan's hibernation was over and done with, Feliciano decided that he would help by bringing some delicious gelato every few days, in order to keep Gilbert a happy bunny at home and thus giving Ludwig – or rather, Ludwig's poor toes – a much-deserved break.

"Ve? Hello?" he repeated. "Lud–" he began, then trembled when a very, very loud and frustrated shout came from within the house, practically shaking the whole structure:

_"Why the hell isn't it spring yet?"_

"Ve~ that was Ludwig! I guess they're home!" he exclaimed, then resumed knocking on the door.

-x-

"Will you quit it?" Gilbert raged as he tried to free his arm from his brother's strong grip. "You said I could go for pancakes! Well, we're here, so go do your fucking marketing and let go of me!" he added, at the same time stamping his right foot on Ludwig's left one.

The younger brother winced. Why, oh why did he decide that he could forgo wearing those steel-toed boots today? Oh yes, he had assumed that Gilbert would be thrilled to go to town that there would not be any foot-stomping sessions. With the resolve and determination only a well-bred _Schäferhund_ could possess, he held on to his furious sibling while he scanned the surroundings.

"Just a moment, Gilbert," he said rather calmly for someone who was about to lose his toes, "I'm waiting for someone."

Gilbert ceased struggling. "Huh? Who?"

"Antonio."

"You invited that loser to come along or something?" Gilbert grumbled, but Ludwig noticed that despite his brother's seemingly unenthusiastic tone, he seemed somewhat excited at the prospect of meeting one of his friends. Ludwig also uttered a silent prayer of thanks, for his brother had also ceased trying to turn his toes into pulp.

"Something like that, yes. I'm just waiting for him to show up, then both of you can go for pancakes, all right? I'll join you later."

"Sheesh West, you're such a fucking mother hen, you know that? Why don't I just go with Feliciano to that pancake parlour, if you're going to be such a – hang on, where the hell is Feli?"

"Feliciano?" Ludwig shrugged. "Remember those girls we bumped into a few blocks ago?"

"The ones with kitty ears? Yeah, I remember, they're kind of cute – _oh._ Oh yeah." Gilbert sighed, remembering how their little Italian greyhound friend was not only good at running, but also at chatting with pretty girls (about pasta, but most of the time girls found it adorable for some strange reason). "I guess we lost him, huh?"

"He'll remember about us soon enough and come join us later."

"Yeah. Look oh brother of mine, I want my pancakes _now,_ so either let go of me or come with me!"

Ludwig sighed and gave in, if only to save his poor feet from a renewed round of being stomped upon. "All right."

-x-

"What's he so mad about?" Ludwig wondered aloud when the polar bear proprietor of the pancake parlour shooed him out of the establishment, insisting that he sit at one of the tables outside. "That's no way to treat a customer, especially if you're starting a new business," he complained as he took a seat.

"What the hell are you talking about? That guy's been here for _years,_ West!"

"Really? I'm quite sure I've never seen him before..."

Gilbert rolled his eyes. "Forget it. What do you want to eat? I'll just pop in and order, since the polar bear won't let you in."

"Whatever you recommend will be fine," Ludwig said, and then regretted his words but it was too late; Gilbert had gone inside the little restaurant. Who knew what Gilbert would order for him? He could almost imagine a five-foot stack of pancakes practically drenched in maple syrup with a dollop of butter on top.

No, on second thought, that would be what Gilbert ordered for himself.

"Ludwig! There you are!"

Ludwig half-turned to find a smiling Antonio waving at him. The turtle made his way to Ludwig's table and invited himself to take a seat.

"Where's Gilbert?" Antonio asked as he squirmed in his chair, trying to find a comfortable position. It must be awkward sometimes with that shell on your back, Ludwig absently thought.

"Inside. Do you want anything? We'll have to wait for Gilbert to come back to order for you though. For some reason the owner of this place doesn't want me inside. Strange."

"Oh, just something to drink would be fine. So what did you want to talk about?" Antonio said, squirming one last time before he finally managed to make himself comfy.

"I need some advice. About Gilbert. And since you're one of my brother's closest friends, I thought I'd ask you." Ludwig also trusted the turtle a bit more than he trusted Gilbert's other close friend Francis, but he kept that to himself.

"Sure, sure! What can I do for you?"

"Due to certain... unavoidable circumstances, I need to find ways to keep my brother wholly entertained for at least another six weeks. Any ideas?" He quickly added, "No outdoor activities!"

"Oh. Video games? He loves them."

_"Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom Part IX_ isn't out yet, and he finished the other games I bought for him."

"Oh, that's a pity. He really likes that bird video game thing. He says the yellow chick hero character is the cutest thing ever! Hmm... how about giving him some other stuff to do like... household chores, maybe?"

"Absolutely not!" Ludwig snapped.

Antonio blinked. "Err, why?"

"Oh. Uh, it's not good for bunnies to bend over a lot." Not good for Ludwig anyway, since he certainly did not want to lose a few pints from the nosebleeds he _knew_ he would get if he spotted his brother bending over.

"Really?"

"Yes, really." On the other hand, he noted that it was more than safe to leave Gilbert in Antonio's care from now on. Ignorance is indeed bliss, but in this case it made Ludwig far happier than Antonio.

"Okay then. How about a pet?" Antonio suggested.

Ludwig stared at the turtle. "A pet? Are you sure?"

Antonio nodded, smiling. "Just get him something really cute! I'm sure he'll take good care of it."

Ludwig mulled that over. While his brother certainly had a reckless streak in him, Ludwig doubted that Gilbert would let anything cute to come to harm. And if he got Gilbert something easy to care for, Antonio's idea just might work. Maybe not a kitten, nor a hamster, but something just as cute and easier to deal with. "What do you suggest? I could just pop over to the pet shop and ask them to deliver it later."

Antonio laughed. "What do you think?" he said, eyes sparkling in amusement.

-x-

"West, what is this box doing on my desk?"

"A box?"

"Yeah, the white one with the weird holes in it... and it's fucking _moving! _What the hell?"

"Open it. It's a surprise."

"It had better be a good one, because if this is – _aaah!"_

_"Gilbert?"_

"Th-th-this..."

"Gilbert, _what _happened– "

"This is so fucking _cute! _Shit, West – is this cute little birdie for me? Oh man, he looks just like the bird ninja commando in the _Super Awesome Bird Legion of Doom_ games! But cuter! The awesome me is going to take care of you now! Here, sit on my head while I find you something to sleep in!"

"Piyo?"


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's note: **A de-anon from the LiveJournal kink meme. The main prompt was 'a cute bunny Prussia trying to run away from an overprotective Germany scared of predators of any kind'.

* * *

**Down the Awesome Bunny Trail: Chapter 13**

_The thoughts of the rabbit on sex_

_Are seldom, if ever, complex;_

_For a rabbit in need_

_Is a rabbit indeed,_

_And does just as a person expects._

_- Anonymous -_

It was time to get up.

He groaned as he rubbed his bleary eyes. He closed them again as he yawned and stretched a little before he rolled on one side. Then he discovered that he had just spent the last three months lying on a lump in his mattress.

"Ow!"

Someone (really, really brave) had once asked him why bears were generally in a foul temper when they emerged from hibernation. He had smiled and in reply, asked the brave soul how _he_ felt when he got up on Monday morning. Pretty awful, yes? Good, good! Now multiply that awful feeling by roughly a hundred days and _you _would feel like ripping a few things with your bare hands yourself, _yes?_

"Ooof," he went as he rolled out of bed and landed awkwardly on his behind, which did little to improve his temper. He reached an arm in the direction of his nightstand and groped around for something to rip to shreds; his sister usually checked up on his condition a week or two before it was time for him to awaken and normally left an old cushion or anything similar there for him to tear apart. It was a routine she had established since he was a young cub, as it was far cheaper for him to rip old cushions meant for the bin rather then getting new bedclothes – or even a new bed.

His hand grasped something soft; probably an old blanket or pillow, he thought. He had pulled the unfortunate object into his lap and was about to start a therapeutic round of shredding when more bits of his brain came fully awake.

He blinked.

Staring at him with the most doleful expression on its face due to a shift in its stuffing, was a rather decrepit-looking stuffed bunny.

Those bits of his brain that were recently roused out of their slumber ran around screaming patriotic slogans for the working class, waking up other bits which in return ran around and screamed some more, thus sparking off a chain reaction which resulted in precisely three seconds' worth of gaping at the stuffed toy in his hands before all the mental activity reached its pinnacle with the panicked uttering of a single syllable:

_"Aah!"_

Ivan jumped to his feet, while the now-forgotten stuffed bunny was sent flying to a corner of the bedroom in his excitement. Oh, it was springtime, yes? That meant he could now go visit a real, cute bunny of his own instead of tearing an old stuffed one apart! Now that his hibernation was over, he could go on – oh , what was the name of that fruit again – ah yes, dates with Gilbert!

Should he call Gilbert straight away to let the bunny know that he was now wide awake? Gilbert's little (but physically bigger) brother had made him install a phone in the house for that reason, as well as to let the overprotective canine know of impending visits. Not that Ivan really blamed him for being a restrictive and somewhat paranoid sibling; _he_ would be afraid to let Gilbert out of the house too, with those cute fuzzy ears and tail. At any rate, he was quite glad that Stuffy Stern Dog was keeping Gilbert safe while he was in hibernation.

No, he could phone later, Ivan decided. He would call Gilbert after a nice, warm shower. A _very_ long and thorough shower, for three months' worth of sleeping was not exactly clean nor hygienic. Humming a tune, he headed for the bathroom.

Ivan checked his reflection in the bathroom mirror; he did not look too bad. Taking Gilbert home had given him time and opportunity to bulk up for his long sleep, and he did not wake up the thin and haggard-looking bear he had imagined he _would_ have looked if the bunny stayed with him.

It was about fifteen minutes later that Ivan first encountered the problem with phones everyone else faced: why must the stupid thing ring only when he was busy shampooing his hair, forcing him to turn off the water and dash out of the bathroom to answer the call, dripping water and suds all over the carpet?

"Hello?"

"Oh. You're finally awake."

Ivan blinked. Ah yes, it was Stuffy Stern Dog. "Yes, I am," he said.

"About time," the _Schäferhund _replied. Then there was a soft click as the canine hung up.

Ivan stared at the receiver and shook his head. If it were not for his cute bunny brother, Ivan would have torn off that Stuffy Stern Dog's ears for that snappy tone.

Oh well. He would just have to be patient and put up with it for Gilbert's sake, yes?

-x-

Done with cooking some sausages and stew, Ivan was just about to have his first meal of spring when someone knocked on the door. He snorted in irritation. First it was that stupid telephone call, and now an uninvited visitor.

Whoever could it be? His sisters had the sense not to come during the first few days of spring, fully aware of his foul temper during that period. Well then, whoever it was, he or she had better be ready for a good pounding, yes?

He flung open the door and was about to give a demonstration of a bear's ill temper in full force when a familiar voice greeted him.

"Hey!" Gilbert said with that superior (yet adorable) smirk, even though he looked rather silly hanging from his brother's outstretched arm, the canine holding him by the back of his collar.

"Gilbert!" Ivan said with undisguised enthusiasm as all homicidal intent disappeared. "Oh. And stuffy younger brother," he added, with the appropriate decrease in level of spirits.

Said stuffy younger brother glared at him, but at the same time shoved a backpack at Ivan, forcing the bear to take it. "His clothes and things," he said, before shoving Gilbert into Ivan's arms, "and _him. _I'll pick him up in two days."

"I thought I was the one who was supposed to go to your house!" Ivan exclaimed. In pleasant surprise, of course; he was not making a complaint. Far from it.

"He wouldn't shut up about how it was spring and that you should be awake by now," Ludwig said in exasperation. "Two days," he repeated, "and if any harm comes to him, I'll rip your throat out." With that last snarled threat, the _Schäferhund_ left, grumbling to himself.

"Did you miss me?" Gilbert asked, grinning.

Ivan nodded, beaming as he led Gilbert inside. "Very much!"

"Good," Gilbert replied and put his arms around the bear's neck. Suddenly, the bunny pulled away. "Hang on."

Ivan did not even bother to hide his surprise and disappointment. "Eh?"

"Did you brush your teeth?" Gilbert asked, wrinkling his nose a little.

Ivan was a little hurt, but he could see Gilbert's position; three months' worth of morning breath was not how he would have wanted to start off the day with either. He nodded. "And I used mouthwash and flossed too!" he added quickly.

"Good," Gilbert said as he moved to push Ivan down on the couch, a rather mischievous glint in his eye.

Ivan knew that look. "Can I at least have some breakfast first?" Ivan pleaded.

"Eating later. Mating now."

For the second time in his life, Ivan squeaked.

-x-

The little yellow bird had fled from its usual perch on his owner's head when said owner had pushed that bear down on the couch. Confused, the bird had flown away unnoticed and then chose to land on the mantelpiece with an annoyed chirp.

Ever since it was sent away from the pet shop, it had been spoilt rotten by its owner for weeks. The choicest seeds, the most comfortable nest of shredded paper and cotton wool; it was everything a young avian could ask for.

"Piyo!" it chirped as it hopped angrily on the mantelpiece, but its owner and that bear failed to hear its soft cry of protest.

After all that lavish attention and now for its owner to ignore him like _that_ – well, really!

Wait... just what exactly was its owner doing? The little thing's eyes widened. Then it wobbled about in shock, for the ongoing action on the couch was just too much for its young, innocent and pure mind.

"Piyo..." it chirped weakly as it covered its traumatised eyes with its wings, then shuddered.

-x-

Ludwig let out one very long sigh of relief once he was a good distance away from Ivan's home. Feliciano was waiting in the car; the Italian greyhound's little hatchback was not suited for the dirt trail that led to Ivan's house and thus his friend had to wait at a near service station located at the main road. Under normal circumstances, Ludwig would not have let the Italian greyhound drive, but he needed to get to Ivan's quick; say whatever you want about Italian greyhounds, but they knew how to get to places in the fastest (and hair-raising) manner.

Besides, whenever Feliciano drove, Gilbert would behave and stay glued in his seat out of sheer terror. (Ludwig had done the very same thing but at least he hid his fear better than Gilbert did and managed to maintain a calm façade throughout the whole journey, even though _he_ gripped _his_ seat a tad too hard and had probably ruined the leather.)

Speaking of good behaviour, getting Gilbert that little chick weeks ago was indeed a stroke of (turtle-inspired) genius; his brother's love for cute things had kept him occupied with his new pet. Gilbert took great care of it, always attentive to its needs, even holding conversations with the little yellow bird. The bird seemed to enjoy the attention Gilbert lavished on it; the two seemed inseparable, with the little chick happy to sit atop Gilbert's head most of the time.

More importantly, it kept Gilbert amused and content. As a result, the bunny did not sulk as much, nor did he sink into one of those foul moods that were so frequent before the arrival of that little bird Ludwig had purchased from the local pet shop. It made waiting for winter to be over much more _bearable_ for both brothers.

Nevertheless, Gilbert had been excited when signs of springtime started to show. He had tried to call Ivan and although he did his best to hide it, the bunny was disappointed when no one answered his call. Ludwig had tried to placate him, saying that it would probably just be a few more days before the bear emerged from hibernation, but that was not good enough for Gilbert, who went back to either sulking like a spoiled brat or swearing like a trooper.

It was then Ludwig who called at precisely nine-thirty in the morning everyday while Gilbert was still asleep in bed, hoping that he would have good news for his brother when the bunny woke up. As much as Ludwig disliked the bear, he disliked Gilbert moping or grumbling even more, so it was a great relief for Ludwig when that morning Ivan finally answered the phone.

"About time," he had uttered. Ludwig had already packed Gilbert's things and Feliciano was on standby with his car – the little Italian greyhound had been excited over the prospects of taking a "wonderful springtime drive, ve!" – and had readily agreed when Ludwig asked if he would volunteer to drive all the way to Ivan's.

At any rate, the weeks spent waiting for spring had allowed Ludwig to think things over. Sure, Ivan was a _bear,_ but Gilbert was partial to him all the same. Ivan also had a steady job and seemed to genuinely care for his brother, for Gilbert had been adamant that the bear had treated him well. Ludwig admitted that he still disliked the whole thing about his bunny brother going out with a _bear,_ but he would try and tolerate the situation.

Anyway, it would be good for both him and Gilbert if the bunny were away at Ivan's for a day or two. He would _finally _get to clean the house, which was an absolute mess thanks to Gilbert's uncertain moods, while Gilbert would finally get to do – Ludwig's cheeks burned with embarrassment – whatever bunnies usually did.

He supposed it can't be helped. It was springtime, after all. Sure, the wind here was still more than just a little chilly, but the sun was warm; greenery had appeared, when before the treeline was just barren and brown. Feliciano had babbled some romantic nonsense about how spring was the time for love in the car, but the noisy revving and the screeching tyres had drowned out most of the Italian greyhound's words.

Ludwig shook his head, then sighed.

Oh well. He would just have to put up with it for his brother's sake, Ludwig thought, unaware that earlier this morning a similar line of thinking had also occurred to a certain bear his brother was so fond of. And if not for Gilbert's sake, then for his own sanity. Not to mention toes.

His eyes narrowed.

He would still rip out Ivan's throat if anything happened to Gilbert though. Very, _very _slowly and painfully.

His mood considerably improved, the _Schäferhund _whistled as he walked down the trail.

**- The End -**

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**Additional notes: **

Thanks for all the reviews, favourites, PMs and fanart - and I suppose you should thank the anon who requested this on the meme as well. Hope you enjoyed reading this.

(I can't believe I wrote UsaGil-tan orz)


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